Cats are weird, oh and my house is haunted

No really...I swear something not of this dimension is totally living in my house.  For the past few months I will randomly hear a loud almost mechanical noise at around 3AM.  It scares the bejeezus out of me!  (of course hubs usually sleeps through it) At first I attributed it to curious cat knocking something but the last few times when I woke up all cats were accounted for... in bed with me *silent scream, silent scream*.  So I pulled the covers over my face and tried to go back to sleep.  On a recent occasion I wasn't fully asleep so when it started I realized it is our printer...prepping to print.  WTF?!?!  I got up and went see what printed...a blank sheet of paper.  "Uhhhhh *gulp*".   Logic kicked in, obviously someone is somehow accidentally accessing the printer via WiFi  or something.  That is why I randomly find blank paper in the finished printing area sometimes.  I turned off the WiFi *yawn* back to bed.

A few nights later I was having a bout of insomnia, sitting on my couch watching TV.  The flipping printer started and I almost screamed.  I slowly crept into the office with my phone flashlight...the WiFi was on and blank sheet of paper was in the bin.  *internal screaming* There has to be a logical explanation...turn off WiFi, curl up in a ball, and pray for sleep.  The next day I asked the hubs if he messed with the printer...maybe turned on the WiFi.  He said no, he hasn't messed with it in a while because the ink is pretty much out.  "Hmmmmm, maybe that is why the paper is always blank *gulp* what would be on the paper if I replaced the ink....".  Shaking those crazy thoughts, I turned off the WiFi (FYI it is a switch) and pretended I wasn't slightly creeped out.  

Last night, while I was home alone, the freaking thing went off again!  I refused to get out of bed.   What good can come out of me investigating the supernatural alone?!?!?  Of course I then slid out of bed, grabbed a stiletto (because that can kill a ghost) and went to investigate.  I tip toed to the office...ya know to sneak up on the undead...flicked on the light...screamed...and then lost it laughing!!!  A black cat was sitting on my desk, next to the printer...right by where the WiFi switch is located.  "Is that lil $hit turning on the WiFi?!?!!?" She ran and I unplugged the printer.  Of course that still doesn't explain the blank paper. . . is she also running a test page???  Did some computer geek come back as my cat and is now messing with me?!? 

OR

Is something else going on and she was just investigating the printer because it was making noise...?!?!?!  I may never sleep again...*waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah*!  So I've decided not to replace the ink...because there are some things we just shouldn't know.  My luck it would say "Don’t cremate me. Don’t cremate me!" If that happened, you would have to commit me because my brain would just shut down.

In other news, she apparently is worried about me.  While old lady cat is a snuggler and will head butt you affectionately (while you are sleeping), the demon spawn tends to keep to herself....unless she is, I dunno, concerned, maybe.  Whenever I am sleeping alone (either hubs is out of town or working late) she pats my cheek with her paw until I open my eyes...then she nuzzles me and walks away..."what...what, just happened....?"