That's it, where is the "unlucky" rabbits foot...it needs to be salted and burned!

For real though, can we get a "reset the day button".  A do-over, like in video games.  $hit is going down fast lets try again. 

1.  My cable company *cough* Comcast *cough, cough* sucks real big donkey d**k.  I've tried and tried and tried and f**king tried to make it work with them and it just isn't (stupid contract keeping me in a bad relationship*grumble grumble*).  They will be fine for like 2 months and then I have to call and freak out because my service is $hit or because they billed me wrong or pick something, its probably happened!  Because of said $hitty service we bought our own cable modem for the interwebs and shockingly enough $hit suddenly works...you can't tell me they don't f**k with your stuff when they have access to it...I sound crazy but I don't think I am.  Anyways, I returned their CRAP modem and got a receipt.  This was in JULY!  It was removed for August, then in September it popped back up on my bill...hold up Mother F**ker what you trying to pull here?!?!?!?  I try to call and I can't get through.  The call immediately drops WTF.  I had FIVE OTHER PEOPLE try from their cell phones (all ATT) and they can't get through...I had someone from a Verizon phone call and it worked...hmmmmm. Also, landlines work....hmmmmm. Whatever, I call, I lose my $hit its credited back and I am told the phone issue is an ATT issue.  Okaaaaaaay.  They say its a Comcast issue (I'll get to that in the next).  I loud cap Comcast on Twitter and finally someone believes me because HIS phone which isn't in LA can't dial the 800# either...I think I heard angels sing. 

 

Anyways....October bill and November bills are fine and suddenly I get a letter "Ooooops we've been billing you wrong, you will see a $10 charge for your Wireless Gateway on the next bill".  What the actual f**k?!?!?!  I DON'T HAVE THAT ANYMORE!  So I try to call and the stupid f**king 800# wont work.  I don't have a landline so I loud cap them AGAIN on Twitter.  He was helpful but didn't believe me.  I sent a picture of the receipt and the letter.  He said "July?!?!?!" Yes f**king July!  Stop trying to bill me for stuff I don't have!!!!  It gets "fixed" after they call me.  And I am told again the phone thing is an ATT issue, call them.  Mother F**ker!!!!

2.  After the 1st insanity with Comcast in September, ATT does some research.  They can't see anywhere its blocked.  They reset my something to my phone.  They checked that I don't have 800#'s blocked (clearly, I don't because I can f**king call them).  They are very nice and concerned and trying to be helpful.  I get to a top tech dude and he is baffled.  They put in a service ticket.  They call me four days later and say its a Comcast issue and they will work with them to fix it.  K, thanks, bye.  After the most recent fiasco I call them AGAIN. I get another tech dude.  He basically does the same $hit and blames Comcast.  I finally had had enough and said "I don't care whose problem it is tell me HOW to fix it!" I told him it started after Baton Rouge and the surrounding areas flooded.  I know for a fact that a MAJOR ATT hub went under and we ALL had service issues for the next week.  So maybe check that and quit putting me off.  I think I stunned him with my "infinite" f**king intelligence.  Look dude I'm not a moron, I did my own investigation before I called.  He opened another ticket so they can see exactly what is happening and let me know.  Great....

3.  My 4 y/o f**king car decided that it wants to leak oil.  Why?!!?!? So I call two different dealerships that service my type of vehicle and ask questions.  Mind you I've already looked up recalls and known issues and *gasp* this is a known f**king issue with the y/m/m of my car *face palm*.  I leave detailed messages with the service admin for a tech or manager to call me but I leave out my knowledge of the issue, just say whats happening. 

• Dealership 1 calls me back.  Oh that sounds like a cracked oil pan (mind you I haven't hit anything and it just started when the temp dropped below 35). More than likely that is it and it will cost roughly $625 because of labor and parts.  So I said, I've been told its a faulty drain plug.  So they say well probably not but if its that, it is $354 because of labor & parts.  I said the part is like $50...you can't tell me it will take you 2.5 hours to replace a plug....? They said yes...okay I'll call y'all when I am ready.

• I get an email from Dealership 2.  "We have received your inquiry on the (y/m/m of my current car).  That is an excellent choice!   A sales team member will make every effort to contact you within one hour or less to answer any questions you made in your initial contact and see how we can help you. We realize you have a choice when shopping for a vehicle and we thank you for giving us a chance to earn your business."  
  WHAT THE F**CK?!?! My response may have been a tad @$$hole-ish.  "Yea, I know a (y/m/m of my current car) is great...I own one.  I bought it from y'all....I wanted a quote about a repair that I've been informed is a flaw in many (y/m/m of my current car)'s...it leaks oil." less than a minute later I get a call from a service tech.  I explain the issue.  He says (without me saying anything about the "known" issue)  "Oh, they probably left the old gasket on the drain plug.  Each new oil filter has a new gasket.  If they don't remove the old one the drain plug doesn't fit as snugly so it leaks." I ask about cost...he said "do you need an oil change? That's all it will cost."

So based off this info...one dealership wants to charge me $600+ dollars to fix something that isn't wrong when the other dealership will fix it for $69. 'Scuse me while I scream into a pillow.  

4.  I went purchase something at a store on my way home.  There were 4 people in front of me at checkout.  I got to the counter.  Got my stuff rung up and the f**king system crashes.  Not just reboots...CRASHES. The poor clerk was so distraught.  He tried everything.  I couldn't leave...I needed to make that purchase.  45 min later I am finally on my way home.  Wine and soft PJ's are calling my name.

5.  I got home and one of the pups had had explosive poopies all over the place.  It smelled like something died in my house.  I legit started crying...and laughing...but mostly crying.  F**k a glass of wine & PJs, someone give me a bottle of Scotch and a punching bag!  

Yay for it being my last day of work for the week.  I don't think I can handle much more stupidity...

Auntie Em, Auntie Em! Oooooh Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore

So yesterday is now filed under things I never need to experience again...EVER.  It was a weather thing.  A BAD weather thing.  A REALLY bad weather thing that had 1/2 the state scrambling to shut down early so people wouldn't be on the roads.

The issue wasn't really rain, although that was a factor too.  The bigger issue was HIGH winds and potential tornadic activity.   While I have had the EA (Emergency Alert) on my phone go off before, had the tornado sirens go off before, had my parish calling/texting take shelter before, and even seen a tornado from a distance...I have NEVER been "in" one.  And I could live the rest of my life without experiencing another...PLEASE.

I mean I know we've been on the way "Outskirts" of tornadoes in the past but yesterday was different.  Yesterday was eerie.  I've had bad feelings before but I was a nervous wreck for a good portion of the day yesterday.  Mainly because the weather people were freaking out.  I was catching up on shows I missed when my phone really started going crazy with texts from family.  So I tuned to WDSU and my jaw dropped.  There was a tornado on the ground not far from me.   Thankfully it went just north of me but the fun wasn't over yet.  As I was staring out my back door at the sky I noticed the clouds looked "funny".  They were moving erratically, not in any one direction.  

I was debating if I should grab the animals and jump in the tub when insanity happened. 

- Everything went impossibly still. 
- Then blinding rain started coming down sideways
- There was a loud bang/explosion and the power was gone
- A siren went off 
- My phone went off 
- I grabbed two cats and two dogs and shut myself in the bathroom 

I know they say it sounds like a "train" and I can understand why.  But its not really a train.  It is quite a disturbing sound and hard to describe.  Almost like an angry moan.  It was loud and it went from moan to almost a shrieking.  You could hear $hit slamming into the house and then it was over.  It lasted minutes...seconds...I don't know.  So there I was in the dark, in the bathroom, with my phone screaming at me with alerts & seek shelter phone call/texts, and 4 frightened animals.  I literally just sat there pondering if I should exit the bathroom or hang out for a bit.  I opted to hang out for a bit.

Hubs called a few minutes later.

- Please tell me it missed us!?!?!? And y'all are okay. 
- Ummm I think so...I am in the bathroom and am not sure if I want to leave yet.

I eventually ventured out and *whew* the house was fine.  It took him 20 minutes to get home!  He works less than 5 miles away!!!   But all the damage and downed power lines made him take a crazy route to get home.  He said he was leaving work when it hit.  He said he looked towards our neighborhood and saw black clouds in the sky and a "wall of white".  He couldn't see the road/houses/businesses.

Y'all don't understand...it literally skipped our neighborhood.  2-3 blocks from us in most directions looked like a war zone but our little area just had some branches down, missing shingles, and broken fences...oh and no power.  How...???  It sucks!  Those poor people!!! Its only been three years since the flood and now they are missing roofs because of a f**king tornado!!!

We may not have power till Thursday or Friday...*gulp* that sucks! But ya know what...no power and losing my frozen foods is fine...at least my home, me, and my animals are all good. 

UPDATE - Apparently there were seven tornadoes in the area....SEVEN!!!  What the actual f**k?!!??!?

Alight, who dumped the crazy juice into the drinking water???

Seriously though.  Everyday, just about, I get a news alert about some jacked up person with a weapon and it makes me feel stabby.  Yes I know I just eluded to violence in response to violence but the difference between the crazy I'm talking about and my "feeling" is I won't actually go out and stab someone!

I'm not getting into the gun law debate...that $hit is crazy as well.  But I do want to point out that it appears that no matter where you go in the world psychopaths with guns are in competition with each other to see who can amass the higher body count.  This isn't a video game people!!! It is f**king terrifying.

Side Note - I don't believe violent games/movies create violence...I think most times it is a lack of intelligence and a lack of self control that creates violence.  Untreated severe mental illness not included. 

We have the nut jobs in the states who have opened fire in public spaces like movie theaters and offices.  We have the loony toon on the train in Europe who was thankfully taken down by some brave individuals before he could do anything really stupid.  We have the INSANE crime in NOLA.  No really...it is so f**king bad it gives me migraines to watch the news.  When you get an alert that a 13 year old robbed an elderly man at gunpoint you know the world has gone to $hit and its plain to see why you have lost Faith in Humanity.  In the same day you also get an alert saying that a during a routine traffic stop some jack@$$ shot a State Trooper in the head...in the HEAD...what is happening?!?!?! Then you remember that a month ago a 13 year old was arrested because he raped an 8 year old.  How...what...why...how do you ...*hangs head in defeat*.

Yes, I know the state of our mental health, healthcare sucks BUT the crazy is running rampant.  I am saying crazy...maybe its more like delusional...drug induced...self inflicted insanity.  Alcoholics, drug addicts, and mentally unstable persons have been around for a very long time.  This isn't anything new.  So I am really confused as to WHY it is such an epidemic of violence in recent years that is blamed on these things.  Is it because we are more connected so we hear about more?  Are the mind altering substances that much "better"?  Are more people partaking in them?  Is it because these individuals were raised by parents who lived in an "enhanced" state?  Or is it because people were never taught to respect life...or even deal with life for that matter? 

Look, life sucks. . . it isn't easy. . .and bad things happen even to really good people.  But as an adult, you cannot continue to blame your bad behavior on anyone else.  Even if you had a craptastic childhood or marriage or whatever...there comes a point where you have to take responsibility for YOUR actions.

Yes, it is easier said than done but if we RESPECTED life as much as people seem to take it for granted, I think the world would be a much different place.  A better place...maybe.  And as sad as I am to say this if you want to end your life...I don't like it but so be it...all I ask is that you quit taking a room full of innocents with you in the process!

UPDATE!!!!!  WTF it got worse.  This is NOT how I envisioned starting my day...

Then I logged into Facebook and was bombarded with the story from like every news station, it is horrible!!!  Link to "breaking news"

What the heck did I do now?!? Nothing, I did nothing...in case you were wondering :P

I love being on the receiving end of someone else's bad day.  Yes, I know we all have them.  Yes, I know we are all human but don't forget... just because you are having a craptastic day doesn't mean you have to make everyone else's day craptastic as well. 

I always try to put on a happy face.  And even if I can't, I attempt to remember that the cashier at the grocery, the rep on the phone, my husband, etc. more than likely didn't do "it".  They didn't do anything wrong so I shouldn't take out my frustrations on them just because they happen to be in my vicinity.

$hit happens...emails don't go through, things fall through the cracks...people don't want to do their jobs...if these things happen to you it SUCKS big donkey d but it doesn't mean you have to be a tornado of rage and bring everyone else down with you.  I hate it when I am having a wonderful (or even just a decent) day and someone absolutely rips me apart FOR NO REASON except I happened to answer the phone/email/text.  It blows my mind!  I think it is because I am so conscientious of everyone else's feelings now that I am taken aback when others don't reciprocate that same conscientiousness. 

I guess, I think, you don't know what is happening in their day.  What if you lash out at someone who is already in a downward spiral and they lose hope?  They are teetering on the edge and you don't just nudge them over, you DESTROY them, all because you are having a craptastic day.  Your unnecessary venom could affect them much more than you realize.  Plus, your problems that seem like the end of the world to you could be so trivial compared to what someone else is mentally going through yet they may keep their's hidden behind a small smile. 

So you have an issue but you haven't addressed it with the company you have an issue with.  While I know I sometimes have a tendency to be sarcastic, I will normally not go that route initially, depending on what I am told.  I will first tell you "take a breath and call them to see what you can do, it is probably an easy fix." THAT is a nice thing.  THAT is me trying to neutralize the anger.  THAT is me trying to f**king help!  I honestly would not expect to get a "f**k you too, b**ch!" back in response.  I am not sure why I deserved that but okay.  I don't respond to that; I won't respond to that.  THAT is a person trying to start a fight with you because they are mad at someone else.  So I stayed quiet.  That should have been the end of it.  A mentally STABLE person would have realized they overreacted and stopped texting or apologized.  Nope, not in my case.  I received at least 4 more texts detailing why I am a horrible person for not supporting them in their anger at x-company.  WTF?!? I am not one to throw guilt usually but I will make you feel like an @$$ if you push me too far.  After I received a text stating I was a coward for not saying anything, I finally had enough of the "verbal" abuse and replied. "I am sorry if  I am not as chatty as usual, you see I am not exactly having the greatest day either.  I just found out my old dog is dying of bone cancer.  But in relation to our previous exchange about your life altering problem, I still think you should call x-company and ask for some assistance." *crickets*

Not my proudest moment but I got my point across.  Yea your day sucks and yea you took it out on me and yea you had no idea what I was dealing with but that doesn't make it okay.  You didn't stop at one attack.  You continued to use me as a punching bag just because you thought you could, because I am family and that's what I am here for...I guess.  People laugh at me when I say I had a "f**ked up childhood" because they only see my family when they are "normal" or in other words, behaving because others are watching.  I am not kidding, you try having an immediate family that can snap in a split second.  Never knowing if what you say is going to trigger some bat$hit crazy response.  I am a firm believer in "family don't end with blood" because I can say with 100% confidence most of my "family" has zero genetic relation to me.