Was that a f **king slug?!?!

 So down here in the deep south we are in the pollening season. 

Which means everyone is sneezy, itchy, and gross.  Even if you don't have "allergies" the pollen wages war.  Normally its doesn't get me too bad but if I am going to be in nature for a long period of time I take an allergy pill as a precaution.  

The other day in the garden I was viciously attacked by nature.  I was fighting with some giant weed from hell when suddenly in came loose, threw me on my butt, and covered my in a layer of yellow.  I had plant spunk all over my face, hair, chest, and arms.  

I "dusted" myself off and finished my chore.  After showering I kept feeling a sniffle but nothing major. That night we went out to dinner as a treat.  While waiting for the hubs to finish ironing his shirt, I kept feeling like I needed to blow my nose but nothing really came out.  

So we are sitting at this nice-ish restaurant and I'm like, I need to blow my nose.  So I go to the ladies room.  There were other people in there so I didn't want to blow obnoxiously.  Some...funk came out (whoohoo) but my right sinus still felt weird.  I went back out to continue with dinner.  As we are enjoying our appetizer I again can feel something weird in my face so I go back to the ladies room.  

This time no one was in there so I went full force with the blow.  I felt an immense pressure release from my right sinus and come out my nose.  

But yay, success!

When I pulled the tissue away something slingshotted back into my nose.

I blew again and again when I pulled the tissue away it shot back in. 

I blew a third time and....ya know this is gonna get even more TMI, feel free to stop reading....

So third time, and I "grabbed" before I stopped blowing.  As I slowly pulled the tissue away I felt...

I felt something sliding down my nasal cavity.  

I am staring at myself in the mirror saying 

"Oh my god, oh my god"

"what the f**k is that"

"What is happening, what is happening"

"Oh god!"

Finally whatever it is slides all the way out into the tissue, and bounces.  

It is a opaque white/yellow, 2" long, fairly wide....wad of...SNOT!  It looked like glue or something!

So I am just staring in disgusted curiosity at what I just extracted from my nostril when I hear:

"hey, that kinda looks like the slime my grandkids play with"

I about jump 10' in the air.  There is a 4' tall little old lady next to me.  I have no idea where she came from or how long she's been there but she is also staring at my extraction.  

She patted me on the shoulder, "I bet you feel much better now, don't you suga" and then wandered off laughing into one of the stalls. 

I stood there horrified and embarrassed for two more seconds before I tossed the tissue, washed my hands, and returned to dinner.  

I have had some pretty gross things happen when I am sick but this was by far the strangest...and I'm not even SICK!

I swear I didn't plan on getting sloppy

Ha...hahaha! Okay so not sloppy but definitely not good.  I don't drink terribly much and when I do it's just a couple.  But the other night...dear god what was I thinking??!?!!?

We went to dinner where I had 3 Old Fashioneds. THREE! I am buzzed from one usually so what possessed me to have 3 is beyond me...

But I did and I was fine. I know this because I had on 5" heels and managed to not fall on my face walking to the car on NOLA Potholed streets.  This is not easy sober so I am going out on a limb and saying the 8 course small plate meal was enough to mostly counter the effects of the 3 glasses of almost straight bourbon!

Then we went to a friend's house for after dinner board games and MORE Drinking.  WTF woman you are not 21 anymore!!! You cannot drink like that and be functional the next day.  Over there I had 3 glasses of wine.  THREE!  Along with chips, peanuts, and other random snackies.  Because the 8 course meal wasn't enough.

I remember saying it was time to head out. I don't remember leaving.  I don't remember the ride home.  I don't remember putting up my coat.  I don't remember feeding the dogs.  I don't remember laying down on the couch.  I don't remember ANYTHING after saying we should head home until 6AM when I woke up on the couch in my dress with makeup still on, a knotted mass of hair, and a cat on my chest.  

I waited for the pang of a headache, the nausea, the hangover...but nothing happened.  So I stripped down, put on a t-shirt and went to bed.  I woke up at 8:30AM and still no "hangover".  How is this possible?!?!?! I've had hangovers after drinking way less.  

The hubs was also past the 6 drink mark but he remembers everything, including me having a full conversation and passing out mid-sentence.  

He didn't have a hangover either.

Around 10:30AM I had a ridiculous craving for a burger, so we got lunch.  AFTER I ate the tell tale signs of nausea and just uncomfortableness kicked in but nothing bad and still no headache.   My only conclusion is I drank a ton of water at dinner, at my friends, and when I woke up at 6AM somehow saving me from a wicked hangover.  

I didn't feel great but at least I wasn't hurting for days like some people my age complain about after a night of binge drinking.  It was a lazy day after but the animals weren't complaining because we cuddled on the couches all day.  

Follow your nose....actually don't....

Right anyways.  You ever just have a gut feeling?  Like something isn't blatantly obvious but you just know in your heart something is...off!

We got mussels to steam for dinner.  I have done this countless times.  We buy from the same place every time.  But something...something was nagging at me at the store.  We still got them though....

We washed and cooked them as soon as we got home.  I was sautéing onions and garlic in butter...hubs was washing and removing the dead ones (about 7...hmmmm that seems like a lot). 

There wasn't an "OMG WHAT IS THAT SMELL" moment like our friend up top had ....

I dumped in the wine and lemon juice, seasoning and dropped in the mussels. 

I have a really good sense of smell...like freakishly good.  Something didn't...it just wasn't...right...it was off.  As soon as I removed the lid my body recoiled.  Again nothing slapped me in the face but on some instinctive level my brain was screaming....

Hubs was like it smells fine, like steamed mussels in wine/butter sauce...

And they were fine.  Until I saw one that looked like something hubs hacked up during a sinus infection and then let dry in the sink. 

So I just moved it to the trash pile.  My lovely hubs had one also...he did not see an issue with the jerky looking YELLOW mussel...he immediately spit it out and gagged. 

I couldn't bring myself to eat anymore but I sniffed the "jerky looking one" (not the one he spit out!) and a memory came flooding back. 

An incident a few years back where we a  boiled sack of crawfish that about 1/3 of was dead.  For those non southerners...a few dead ones are gonna slip in...but they are usually like freshly dead.  1/3 of a 40 lb sack is A LOT and these were hidden in the center of the live ones...and pale...clearly been dead...a while! 

The smell...it...its hard to describe but its like rotting flesh that you seasoned really well and then laid in the sun...for a week. 

A friend compared it to badussy...but I think that was being kind...

Clearly, there must have been a few LONG dead mussels in the pot that we missed.  In such a small sample just a couple, spoils the WHOLE pot. 

It wasn't the slap you in the face funky cooch smell from the crawfish boil but clearly I smelled something that had been dead...a while...

Lesson...trust your gut.  If its telling you food is spoiled...its probably spoiled.  And I don't mess with bad seafood....I've had that...talk about wanting to die...worst food poisoning of my LIFE! See this Post...

I grew a wang

Hahahaha did I make you spit out your drink??? *whoohoo*

But seriously...I did grow one just not in the sense you might be thinking.  Over the last few weeks we really haven't been home.  So I have been neglecting our food resources.  There are certain staples we ALWAYS have in our house.  Rice, Pasta, Eggs, Cheese, Onions & Potatoes.  That might seem like an odd combo but you can survive off of those if you have nothing else.

Anyways, since our Mardi Gras-ing is over I started trying to get back into things like cooking and cleaning (ugh, I hate cleaning).  Last Friday we decided we wanted to fry up some shrimp and potatoes.  *whoohoo* "Free" dinner because I had shrimps in the freezer and a bag of potatoes in the pantry. 

**Note**

Yes, I know the plural of Shrimp is Shrimp but some people 

'round here say "Shrimps", so I say it as a haha.

Moving on!  I pulled out 5 potatoes to clean and slice and this came out.

What in the world?!?  It was the only one that sprouted which isn't that odd or why I am "what in the world-ing".  We've already established I have an overactive imagination.  Look at it!  Look closely...closer....CLOSER!  It looks like an alien pee pee *giggle, giggle*.  I emphasize the ALIEN part because if your man has a wee that looks like that...run away...run far FAR away!  Maybe I am reading too much off the wall fanfiction (stop judging me, some of it is really interesting) but my first thought was "OMG Alien Wang!"  And now I just can't unsee the pee pee.

Use your imagination!!! It's got a fairly defined "tip" (not the green sprout, I don't know what that is...maybe a "tickler"...). It has "spikes".  It is WAY tooooo crooked.  This all just screams Martian reproductive organ.  On second thought maybe I should be the one writing off the wall fanfiction...hmmmm.

I didn't have the heart to cut it off and cook the potato or toss it (why am I having feelings for a potato penis!?!?) so I let it be.  I kind of want to see what becomes of my Alien appendage.  I won't lie (that I can't deny.)  Why am I quoting Limp Bizkit?!?! Oh right..Nookie...*snicker, snicker* ... anyway, I want to see if it gets bigger and looks even more phallic *muahahahaha*.

This is why we can't have nice things

Or this is why we have so much fun...depends on how you look at it.

Going out to a nice restaurant is something an over 30 year old should be able to do without incident.  And for the most part that does happen.  But for some reason my husband and I turn into giggly 8 year olds sometimes and the results get us judge-y stares.  It doesn't help that we look very young. 

We were behaving quite normally at our most recent outing until the appetizer came out.  We are both fairly adventurous eaters. We will try most new things, especially seafood things.  So imagine how happy we were when we found out the special that night at this "fancy" place was barnacles.  Yea I said barnacles.  I have NEVER...NEVER EVER thought hey you know that algae covered thing on the bottom of a boat, yea lets eat it!  But our waitress seeing our confused looks quickly clarified that these are "gooseneck barnacles" and are from the pacific northwest area.  They grow on rocks that jut out into the ocean, not on the bottom of things in the harbor.  Okaaaaaaay, sure why not...anything sauteed in butter has got to be good, right???

Then they came out and that was it.  The maturity level at our table plummeted.  Thank GOD we waited until our waitress finished explaining how to eat them before dissolving into a fit of giggles.  True story, first thing I did was pick one up and say "*snicker, snicker* it looks like a *suppressed giggle* it looks like a tiny wrinkled deformed wee wee *snort* in a dragon scale!!!!!!!!!!!!".  I have quite an imagination.  But for reals, you have to see that they look a little, uh, questionable...

Seriously,

 could you....

  have kept...

 a straight face?!!??!

Come on man!

**NOTE** These are not my pics.  I had to internet search some because I didn't want to get more weird looks from the snoots at the restaurant by taking pics of my phallic looking food.

By the way you eat them kinda like a crawfish.  In the sense that you "pinch the hard tip" (like pinching the tail) and "pull gently on the meat with your teeth".  You would have lost it as well, don't lie, you have the same dirty mind I have! 

By the way, they were totally delicious!  A little weird at first but yummy none the less. 

This should have been the end of our adventure...nope!  We got our meal (also delicious) and on top of my amazing duck breast was some fried fat/skin.  Yea buddy, who don't love some cracklin.  But it was HUGE!!! I mean, waaaaaaay more than a mouthful so I had to cut it in half and then in half again.  Have you ever tried to cut a fried piece of fat/skin????  I was trying to be careful....adding a little more pressure with the knife, trying to be subtle.  When suddenly the knife slipped making a loud clattering noise and half my cracklin went shooting across the table.  "Doh!".  I said "*eep* uh, slippery little sucker", which got a giggle from my husband and an evil glare from the table next to us.  What?!?!  I'm just happy my hubs got the pretty woman reference, although he did steal the rogue piece of cracklin. 

Not everyone was giving us evil looks.  I think most thought we were an adorable couple but a few peeps were definitely looking down their noses at us.  Eh, whatever, at least we have fun!!!

My @$$ is going to get me in trouble one day

I've always had quite a butt.  Even when I was in high school and weighed like 80lbs (naturally, I wasn't sick or anything), I had this bubble butt thing going on.  It's not overly big, I am no Nicki Minaj but it is like *whabam*.  I have a fairly tiny frame for the most part (no where near 80 lbs anymore) but my @$$...good lord...it demands attention.  I am pretty sure if it could talk it would say "hey, hey you!  Yea, look at me, you know you want to, mmmmhmmmmm". 

Of course I don't try very hard to hide it, I like tights and skinny jeans, so sue me.  Well last night I went out to dinner, nothing fancy, and I wore fleece lined tights and an oversized boyfriend plaid shirt.  It covered by butt and then some so hush.  I thought nothing of the outfit, it was cute, comfy, and casual.  I got up to get a refill for my drink and noticed one of the cooks watching me.  The place was small and fairly empty so I  thought, "Eh, whatever".  I got my drink and headed back to my table.  Apparently I have a sashay when I walk.  Because I heard someone say VERY quietly "Oh yea, shake shake shake señora." I kind of slowed down and I am pretty sure my expression was  O.O.  Before I could turn around there was an *ahem* from the manager so I just kept walking.  

When I got home I was informed I needed to wear that outfit more often because "damn!"  Ahhhhh now that "shake shake shake señora" makes a little more sense.  I really wasn't trying to attract attention on purpose but apparently my @$$ had another agenda.

I don't know what to think...

No really I'm a little confused!

OK so I went on yet another date with my Internet guy. He asked me to come over to his place to watch a movie/dinner. I was a little apprehensive about this one because we all know what most men think when a girl is coming over for the first time AND he lives with his mom and lil brother. I was trying to find every excuse in the book not to go. He somehow talked me into it!!!

I got there and I meet his mom and bro, which is WEIRD for me because I usually do not meet family members until we have been dating for a while. We've been talking since the very end of July and its only the beginning of September...not nearly long enough. Anyways, his mom had cooked. It was really good too. They left us to eat alone...so it was me him and their 3 little yippy dogs that barked at me the entire time. After we ate his mom was like I hope your not scared of them, I was like oh no, I have 3 VERY big dogs, ankle biters do not phase me - haha, its true!

A bit later he asked me if I wanted to go watch a movie...in his room. Can I just tell you how awkward that was for me?!? Its like "hey mom, I'm gonna take this girl you just met to my bedroom, k lata." I know, I know we are adults but its still uncomfortable. Not to mention what went through my head...we all know what goes on in the bedroom, ah hem.

We started watching a movie and I layed down the law REAL quick. He wasn't pushy or anything but he was a little touchy feely so, I figured I needed to make sure we were on the same page.

Don't get me wrong there was alot of making out but thats as far as it went. But then the weirdest thing happened. He looked at me, told me how much he liked me, how amazing he thought i was and wasn't sure how I felt but wanted to see if I wanted to take things to the next level. I think I gave him a funny look because he back tracked quickly and said "or we can get to know each other better and see what happens." I nodded to that part but I was confused. What was he talking about?!? Was he propositioning me for sex or was he asking me out? I really wasn't sure... I thought I made it clear sex was something that was out of the question...for a while, THATS a big step for me, especially if I like someone. So what was it, he never clarified what he was asking, he just snuggled up to me and we finished watching the movie.

I do not know what to think... any suggestions?!?!?!

5th, 1st Date - I thought 3rd time was the charm...

OMG OMG OMG OMG?!?!?!?!?!?!

I had a good date! Seriously, it was good from beginning to end. Yay, about freaking time!

So this is the cousin of one of my friends (nice, I know). So I met him at his house and we went inside and he said "you know my parents, right?" which of course I know them, they are at all functions at my friends house. Anyways, I hear from the other room "HI NOLA GURL!" So I went to say hello. His mom was funny, as we were leaving she says "You two have fun tonight." Then giggled. It was a little uncomfortable at first but we started talking.

We went eat first at a seafood restaurant near the theater. Poor thing seemed exhausted but we talked and joked around a little. It was fun but kind of surreal because I have known him for a while and didn't ever look at him as someone I would/could ever date. But it was nice.

Well we went to the movie, Pineapple Express, which was FREAKING HILARIOUS!!!!!!! It was such a stoner movie but I loved it. We walked in and NO ONE was in the theater but us. Which was kinda uncomfortable because we were all alone in a dark theater on a first date. But right before the movie lots of people showed up. We sat really close in the movie but no hand holding. I think he wanted to but was unsure of how to maneuver it.

The movie let out kind of late so there was no going out after. We talked more on the ride back to his house, it was a bit more relaxed. Well we got to the house and he walked me to my car. I wasn't sure what was going to happen because I dunno...because I just wasn't sure. Well I went to hug him goodbye and he kissed me. I melted, it was weird at first but I dunno. It was nice, very sweet. Anyways I got in my car and was all giddy (I know I am a dork). Well when I was almost home I got a text "Just wanted to make sure you made it home safe. Thanks, I'd like to do it again sometime." Hehehe, that made me even more giddy because it was so sweet.

So my date did end up going very well. I was worried because he's my best friends cousin, so if things went badly I have to see him ALL THE TIME. I guess we'll see if there is a second date. For the first time I really hope there is one :) *sigh* I am such a dork.

4th First Date, Yea Another One ;)

Seriously, Do I have "I ♥ Dorks, tattooed to my Forehead"????

So I went on a date with this guy. He works with at the same company as my Aunt. Talked to him on the phone and saw some pics and he seemed cute-ish. The PROBLEM, in the pics he had on a hat and/or sunglasses. So we meet up and my first thought was "Hmmmmm, he kinda looks like my High School Sweetheart", and that was it no chance of attraction. Not that I do not like my HS Sweetheart but I wouldn't want to date him again therefore this date was pretty much over the second it started. But you can't hold it against him so I gave it a chance.

We went eat at Outback and there was a wait. So we are waiting in the bar area and I am like "I need a BEER", haha (it had been a ROUGH week). So he goes to get us drinks. I am standing there and this guy walks up to his wife, who is sitting at the bar in-front of me and says "Dumb blonde hostess said 20 min, 25 min ago and now just said another 15 min to wait. Dumb blonde b---h." I didn't say anything, then he turned around and was like "Oh hey there, uh no offense." And his wife/gf told me I could feel free to dump my drink on him. He he. They were super nice and funny. There were two seats by them and they offered them to me and my date. Well the guy turns around and sees my date with this MASSIVE beer (Abita Amber) and he said "Think you can drink all that man." To which my date replied, "Its for her." The guy turned to me and said "Thats for you? My kinda girl!" And gave me high five for it ;) Haha. Well my date sat down and he didn't have a drink. So I am thinking "OMG really another NON-drinker, are you freaking kidding me!" Not that I want someone who is a hardcore drinker but I like to have fun and I usually drink soooooooooooooooo someone who will drink with me would be nice.

Well our new friends went to stalk a table by the bar, and we talked and kinda got to know each other a little while waiting for a table. Well I notice the table behind us is about to pay and since we are in the bar and its every man for himself in that area I started watching closely. He was like are you really gonna snatch that table when they get up...I was like HELL YEA, I'm hungry ;) haha. So I did and he was like, WOW. That's when I realized how "Innocent" he was.

So here's the low down: He drinks just not a-lot...just because, he has NEVER tried any Abita beers and he has lived here all his life, He's never HEARD of Jager - which blows my mind because he went to college, he doesn't really go out, he lives on some acreage his parents gave him and has farm stuff, he's an IT guy, he's into NASCAR (I almost died), his idea of fun is outdoor anything (4-wheelers, camping, fishing, etc - Cool, I can dig that), his last gf was protestant and he talked with her parents about not having sex until marriage..............and he thinks I am just the most beautiful thing in the world - oh lord.

OK so he was VERY nice, I mean seems like a great guy BUT he was such a dork. And not in a cute dork way, like really kinda geeky/dweeby. Well after dinner (and a very large beer) he asked if I wanted to go to a movie. I started to say no, but I decided to go anyway. So we go see "Wanted", which if you like really far fetched Matrix type stuff is great. I liked it but some scenes were so out there I was laughing (thats terrible right). Well the movie was like 1.5 hr away from starting so we went get a drink while waiting. And he got a drink with me (Cool). He decided to try an Abita Amber...to which he said was too strong, he much prefers a bud light...OYE. I am so not a Bud Girl unless I am tubing and even then its BUD not Bud light. But to each his own. I also found out he really hasn't tried hard liquor until recently but only rum, JD & tequila but he didn't really like them...much prefers beer.

Anyways we are in the bar and I go to use the restroom and this random drunk guy stops me and says "I don't want you to feel left out, can I give you a hug." to which I replied "I have Mace" and his friends just about died laughing, and asked me to stick around. I ended up giving him a hug and told them I was on a date. They were like....Ohhhhhh, with him, really. Whatever silly drunks. But it kinda sucked bc the guy that hugged me was really cute! Anyway, right before the movie I went potty again and as I was walking to the door, it flung open at me and this woman said sorry. Then she said, "Hey, the Hot girl, don't worry honey my friend that liked you left." I was like darn, but I laughed.

Ok, so all throughout the movie he kept trying to hold my hand and I had my arms folded or in my lap...not bitchy standoffish but standoffish none-the-less. Well at one point he was like are you cold and offered an arm and I was like no I'm good (I know not nice but I didn't want him to get the wrong idea). After the movie he brought me back to my car and I hugged him and said thanks and jumped out of the MASSIVE 4x4 pick-up. He was like I'll call you, I said uh ok sure and hopped in my car.

So like I said very nice, but ZERO attraction. We talked a-lot and joked so I could see him as a friend but nothing more. But I mean seriously why are these guys always after me. Do I have an I date dorks sign on me? I guess I am just too nice, whatever.

2nd, 1st Date (Different Guy)

Sometimes I wonder what is going on in my own head...

We all know its usually a bad idea to go on a date with a "friend" but for some reason we still do it sometimes, hoping it doesn't ruin things. So I went on a date with this guy I've known since college. He is a really nice guy...almost too nice. I remember over the years he's gotten his heart broken a few times. He seems to dive head first into things and forgets to think about him. At least thats what I have seen over the years.

So I was kind of nervous about this "date" one because I've been out of the dating scene for so long AND because he was an acquaintance of a guy I dated in College (for 3 years). So needless to say it was a little uncomfortable at first.

I met him at his apartment, which I normally do not do when I first go on a date but since I knew him from before, I thought, why not. So I went there after work (5PM). I changed into Jeans and chatted with his roommate while he got ready.

We left to go eat at 6PM (way too early for me) so we went to hang out at a new brewery/restaurant. We sat at the bar and at first we didn't talk too much, but after a few sips of beer we were chatting like old friends. Not a lot of flirting though. We ended up eating there and having a couple more beers. Great food and the beer wasn't so bad either. Well we left there and went to this wine loft place...and ordered beers, nice right ;). Well we sat on one of the couches and would get a little close then one of us would move away. It was kinda funny. Anyways we were there for a while, chatting and stuff. Discussing how he thought me and my ex were still together because every time he's in town...we are together. Well after the first beer at the wine place he moved on to crown and coke...I stuck with beer.

Then we left there and went to this restaurant next door to eat a snack and drink some more. We sat at the bar at this restaurant also and after we ordered he suddenly and very smoothly put his arm around me. Which I was a little uncomfortable with at first but adjusted to as I got yet another beer. OK so we get a couple appetizers and drank and talked until closing time, which since it was a weeknight, was 10:30ish.

We headed back to his place for me to get my car (my keys were inside - I didn't really think about this before hand). So anyways like I said limited flirting between us so I didn't think anything of going back to his place to get my stuff. Well either I was completely oblivious to the signs or I made him extremely uncomfortable about flirting with me bc all of a sudden back at his place he kissed me.

Wow, can I just say, WOW. He is a great kisser. So instead of me going home (I was supposed to stay at a friends house) at a decent time...I made out with my old college friend for a few hours. It has been a very long time since I have had an extended make out session, I forgot how fun it is ;). Needless to say by the time we stopped it was oooooh 2AM and I had work in the morning. I was going to leave but he insisted I stay because of it being so late. So I argued a little but then I did stay...nothing happened...maybe little more kissing. So anyways, 7AM came very quickly and I had to shower. So I showered a this guys house and left to go to work.

I NEVER do that. I still cannot believe I slept at his house after 1 date...I mean nothing happened but still. Of course I did know him from before so its not that weird but still. Anyways, I had a great time with him and he was a GREAT kisser sooooooooooooooo I guess we'll see if there is a date number two with him.

My First, First Date in 4.5 years

So I went on a date...with this guy...and it was so weird (but not in a bad way)

This guy is a little older than me (he's 33) but we've talked on the phone and he seemed fun.

So we met at Cheesecake Bistro to have dinner. Oh my God can I just say, that place is freaking crowded and LOUD. But the food was still pretty good :) He was super sweet. Not really the type of guy I usually go after (AKA he's not tall and skinny ;)) He's like 5'6" I think and not a big guy but not skin and bones, haha. We laughed ALOT and got along really well. We talked about so many different things that I couldn't even tell you what was said ;).

So anyways we are there and of course you know me, the first thing I do is order a Dirty Martini, cause thats how I roll and he ordered a Water...with Lemon... I was like OK maybe he just doesn't like to drink in-front of people he doesn't really know. Then we ordered and I am not the chick who gets the smallest salad and whatnot, but I did get a healthy dish (blackened chicken) and ate like 1/3 of it, I was too busy talking. Well anyways at the end of dinner he asked if I wanted to go to a movie. Since I was having so much fun of course I said yes ;)

So we go to the theater (and its now like 9:45PM) and are looking at the Movies that are playing. Well I don't know about you but I do not like to see an R rated movie on a first date...a steamy sex scene makes all uncomfortable. So we see "You don't mess with the Zohan" the new Adam Sandler Movie. It's PG-13, we were both like, silly comedy, PERFECT. Holy Crap were we wrong. Can I just tell you it was like borderline soft porn, Hahaha I'm not kidding. The whole movie was about Sex and his package. It was pretty funny but oh my, we saw the Zohan's butt like 10 times. So that was so much more uncomfortable than seeing ONE steamy sex scene, hahaha. Anyways, he was very "slick", he somehow maneuvered my arm and then was holding my hand. He was caressing my fingers and hand, it was so weird (not bad) bc I am so not used to that.

Well after the movie he walked me to my car, ALL the way in the back of the lot. I offered to bring him to his car because it was in the parking garage on the way other side of the lot. So he got in my messy car (I had work papers everywhere) and I drove him to his car. So he was about to get out of the car and HELLO he kissed me. Like not a peck, like full on K-I-S-S. I was like um, yea hi there. The problem: He liked to have gagged me with his tongue. It was very invasive, at least to me...I really wasn't expecting it. So then he was all call me when you get home. After he got out, I made sure I was well out of view and cracked up and shook my head. I kept thinking how bad that was. Not the ending I was expecting to such a nice date. Anyways, I think he might like me and I actually like him...just not the kissing part...which is kinda important so whatever we'll see.

Thats my story for now ;)