So I decided to start walking/jogging in my 'hood. . .

But since I live in the deep south and its hotter than Hades down here the only time to go is in the morning.  I mean its still hella hot but its survivable. 

Well I usually go one specific way but recently decided I was going to change it up.  Ya know not leave at the same time every morning, skip days, go different routes, etc.  Anyways, I clearly do NOT pay attention to all the details when I am driving through my subdivision.  I seriously almost had a heart attack this morning and then laughed until I fell over in my neighbors yard.

I was just la la la-ing along, one ear bud in jamming out when I stifled a scream and fell against a car behind me.  I was maneuvering around a vehicle blocking the sidewalk when I saw a figure in my peripheral.  My neighbor has a jungle-esque theme going on in their front yard, like organized chaos.  It's not overgrown...just a lot of plants, I guess an oasis maybe.  There are these huge fern/palm things that tower over the front walkway and partially block the view if the front door and porch.  There was a person behind the huge leaves. He/she was taller than me (which isn't saying much) and extremely pale in the early morning light and they were like peeking through the leaves *internal screaming*.  It took a few seconds for my brain to register it was a statue.  Clearly it is new because I drive past here everyday and I've never noticed it, plus it was still very bright white, not weather worn.  So I started laughing.

Then I realized what it was a statue of...a GIANT angel *ahhhhhhhhhh*.  Without thinking I said "Don't Blink".  Then I lost my shit!  I was laughing so hard at myself I fell in the grass and was on the verge of snorting.  Thank goodness no one was outside.  But I kept my eyes on it just in case.  Of course when I was passed it enough, I turned my back and kept going.  Thankfully it didn't blast me to the past.  I don't think I could handle that alone.  But as I was jogging off I was reciting "Don't blink. Blink and you're dead. They are fast. Faster than you can believe. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink. Good Luck." And I couldn't stop smiling and laughing at how big of a nerd I am.  

So as you can see I almost died this morning.  Well not died but nearly thrown into another time all together!  I can't believe such a dangerous creature lives so close to me.  I'll have to remember to snap a picture of it so I can show you how creepy it is! 

**UPDATE** So I've been meaning to take a picture since I posted this but I keep forgetting.  Then Saturday I took my dogs for a walk with the intent of snapping a photo... it was GONE!!!!  The flipping statue of the flipping angel was GONE!  *internal screaming* I am a bit more terrified of my 'hood now...