Vacation with the kids

The first thing I remember is we were in the mountains in a cabin.  I know my friends were there and my inlaws, like all of them.  And of course hubs.  It was a literal STONE cabin in the woods on a mountain. There were no TVs and I am fairly certain it was  winter like I am 99% sure there was snow.  I was sitting on the floor by a HUGE fire place reading a book.  

Like remember the movie "The Haunting"?  The giant fireplace....Picture that!  I started to get a backache so I got up to sit on the ENORMOUS fluffy couch.  But it was so deep it was almost uncomfortable to sit normally on.  At some point I turned sideways and was leaning back to back against someone else reading on the couch.  I really don't know how to describe it but but we were comfortably supporting each other.  

I went to lean my head back over their shoulder to say something and I noticed they had no hair....it was work bestie.  Wait why are you here??!  Honestly why are we all together!?!?!

Someone yelled food was ready and he helped me up to go to the kitchen.  My MIL had cooked and me and my hubs set the table.  It was this massively long almost medieval looking table.  That's when I realized I think we are in an old castle...that's how we can all fit but still....why is bestie here????  

I assume we ate, I don't recall. Then I was in another room playing pool and I was told someone was asking for me in the kitchen.  Like I vaguely remember them saying a name but didn't know who it was. When I walked into the room bestie's wife was sitting at a small round table with only two chairs.  I sat down with her and we had a really nice convo...about...something. Mind you I've not met her in person, just pics and posts online.  But if felt like a good convo. 

There were lots of kids running around playing all kinds of games.  His kids were definitely there playing with my nieces and nephews.  I was playing with them. Maybe hide and seek... I dunno. I kind of remember his son maybe coming to get me saying they found something in the attic.  

We were in a attic, I think.  But it was open in places, like some of the roof was missing but it also looked like maybe a lab/greenhouse.  There was a jar with something in it.  We were trying to get the something out but we couldn't and didn't want to break the container.  

I dropped it and it cracked but didn't break but I knew I had to get it away from everyone.  Oh did I mention EVERYONE was in the attic/lab/greenhouse with us. 

So I ran out of the cabin which from the outside looked more like a normal log cabin.  I was running barefoot in the snow down the driveway to get to the green trash cans.  You know like the ones we all have in our neighborhoods.  

I knew I had to get it away from everyone but the can was so far away.  I was running barefoot in the snow...my feet were hurting so bad.  They were so cold they were burning.  I heard someone yelling for me...I dont know if it was hubs, bestie or one of my brother in laws but they were yelling for me to stop.  They said I should have let them do it.  Then I stepped on something REALLY sharp.... It felt like it went through my foot. 

I woke up with the WORST Charlie Horse in my leg!!!!!!!!!!

A life not lived

I know I have intense dreams but this one was different.  This one felt a little too real.  

I was in college and I met this guy.  It was a whirlwind romance and we ended up getting married after graduation.  He was my current husband but in reality we met much later in life. 

We went though all the things.  Laughter, love, hardships, etc.  After multiple miscarriages we finally had a baby. We lived in a two story house near my parents.  It was very bright, lots of windows and light colors.  We were happy. 

I remember all the 1sts of our baby boy.  His name was Adam.  His crawling, walking, talking, 1st day of school.  I remember ALL OF IT.  We went through the milestones but also the little things.  I remember scrapped knees and sleepless nights.  I remember pets from babies to death and explaining to him death.  I remember vacations to the beach, the mountains, EUROPE (I’ve never been to Europe…but I have a distinct visual of a museum). 

I remember my parents.  Most of all my mom….she wasn’t like she is in reality.  She didn’t listen to my grandparents and was actually happy with her life. We all grew older. He went away to college.  I experienced empty nesting.  We went on lots of vacations. He would visit during semester breaks.  

We grew older together.  He lived out of town.  One day he came home unexpectedly.  He was making microwave Mac and cheese just like he did when he was a teenager.  He told us me met a girl and he was going to ask her to marry him. 

I remember being so happy.  I remember crying.  I remember the wedding.  And then I woke up.  I woke up and wondered what Adam was doing. Then I got really confused and realized it was 6AM and I needed to get up for work soon. 

I spent the whole day in a daze wondering about this “dream”.

I lived a whole @$$ life in one night.  I didn’t type all the details but I can picture every piece of the kitchen.  I remember going into labor and being rushed to the hospital. The blue dress I wore to his wedding.  My graying hair that actually looked kinda of nice.  

The mind is a crazy thing.  How can it create such a vivid fake reality.  How can I feel like we had a kid who grew up and did wonderful things when we were never able to conceive?!?!  I don’t know what it feels like to birth a baby but I have a very vivid dream memory of the pain, fear, joy, exhaustion. 

I don’t know what to make of this but it’s weird as heck and I needed to write it down.  

I'm starting to think I need to learn something

Its dream time again (apologies in advance). This one I don't remember as much of it but I know with 100% certainty I was back in school.  Like I am the me I am now but also in college classes. 

I am not sure where it began but I remember campus was HUGE and I was walking all over it.  It was very futuristic looking.  Lots of glass buildings, different shapes and angles, VERY clean.  I was in multiple classes but I only really remember one or two.  

It was a group/lab type class.  I was in a group with 3 others (all guys).  One was my work bestie, the other was my newer TALL counterpart whom I am becoming fairly close with (these two refer to themselves as the Italian duo or something haha), and one other guy.  The other guy is like phasing in and out between my husbands operations counterpart at his work and David Tennant (I know my weird @$$ brain!). 

I remember going to this class multiple times.  I always sat across from work bestie and next to the phasing dude.  I think it was a marketing class and the phasing guy was pissing me off because he wouldn't let us get a word in.  

There was another class I was in with most of them except phasing guy was replaced with another male coworker who used to be my manager, I think I usually refer to him as frat guy lol.  We didn't have assigned seats but it was "known" where everyone sat.  One day I was a little late and someone took my place.  Work bestie kept looking back at me over his shoulder looking worried and upset.  There was a test...it was really weird. 

Once it ended I was trying to get out as soon as possible but I didn't have my shoes on (WTF) and was struggling trying to get them on and leave qucikly. 

The next class was the one with phasing dude.  My spot was open but before I could sit across from bestie he pulled me down between him and Tall Counterpart.  This is when I realized we were sitting on the floor around a rectangular table for this class.  

So I sat between them while our phasing friend stayed as David Tennant for a while talking about, I $hit you not, "Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey...stuff".  I haven't watched that particular episode in over two years...WTF. 

Anyways The professor is talking and asked me if I wanted to move to my normal spot. Bestie put his arm around me, pulled me closer, and said "no, she belongs right here between us".  Ummmmm what?!?

The rest of the class is blurry but I distinctly remember bestie making sure some part of me was touching him (not in a sexual or oogie way).  I was writing something and phasing friend tried to touch my arm across the table. Tall counterpart blocked him and Bestie tightened his arm around me and......growled. 

That's where it ended....my subconscious is clearly on drugs!  I feel like there are meanings in all these dreams but I am too exhausted to even try and analyze them. 

We gotta go back, back to schooooool

So to conclude my trio of dreams from the other night.... I was back in School.  

I was on a college type campus.  Like a hybrid between LSU and UNO.  I was taking continuing education classes but it was a full time program. 

It was daytime now.  I remembered the previous situation with my cousins vaguely.  And knew I was in these classes to study "science" related to magic(?).  I was taking a lab.  Like literally what you see in TV Shows/Movies where they are mixing all these colorful liquids.  

I know days were passing but a lot was in the lab.  I also know I was staying in the dorms on campus.  So I am the age I am now but living in dorms.  And the other people there were also around my age... Some of them I know I knew in real life college but I couldn't tell you who they were at this point.  

One day I went out to Brunch with my bestie who didn't actually go to college with me.  We are childhood friends and she went to a tiny university but in the dream she was with me taking other classes.  So we are looking for a spot to park my car and the streets look like NOLA during a parade.  Almost ZERO parking.  But we found a spot near a corner where my little blue car fit. 

Someone at brunch even mentioned a parade which I guess is tying it back in(?).  I know we had beverages and walked(?) back to campus.  Sometime passed and I was walking into my dorm building when an intercom/siren alert went off all over campus.  

There was a threat to campus.  Something about a massive bomb that would send shards out into anyone nearby.  I remember thinking "Oh no they found me!"  As I was running across a parking lot I heard my name.  There was a guy leaning out a window of his  car waving.  It was my short term college boyfriend.  The tall one with dark hair.  

He was like what are you doing???!? Dude my car is off campus, I am trying to get to it.  He was like get in the f**king car!  So I jumped in the backseat.  He was like there is shrapnel and it's going to go off in less than 5 min!!!!! 

So we are peeling out of campus and I am now freaking out. We can't get to my car.  He put his arm over the back seat and was patting my ankle trying to comfort me.  That is was going to be ok and I needed to find him.  I was like you are with me what do you mean.  He looked back at me and said just find me.  

Well if this is happening, where is Thing?

So my previous dream (saving the dog) jumped here. 

I was standing in the street and my little cousin (my cousin's Daughter) was in the box next to the trash can....she'd been hit by a car.  I guess saving the dog caused this?!?!?!

She stood up (Someone was screaming...it might have been me).  Ok so she's the dog now?!?!?  My sleep brain was so confused. 

She was in a dress with a tiara.  She stood up and was like $hit that hurt.  My younger cousin (her Aunt) was like JFC how are you alive!??!  Are you alive?!?!?

She was like yea I'm great.  But she was a weird pale color...dark circles and when she lifted her shirt and the contusions on her side were...AWFUL. Think like death becomes her but without the hole in the abdomen. 

I was freaking out.  She said "you brought me back".  WHAT??!?!?!

Some blonde haired woman with a Pixie cut in a fitted red dress was like "we need to move. There will be consequences".  PARDON.....?

It's still night.  There is still lightening.  We get to this building that looks like a cross between Jack Skellington's Lab and the Addams Family house.  It's dark inside....cluttered but sterile.  The big window from Wednesday was across the room.  Grandma Addams was the one that greeted us.  She said something about messing with dark forces.  

My little cousin was walking and talking just fine but everyone else seemed REALLY concerned.  The blonde went into the bathroom and got in a bath.  She was fully clothed, covered in bubbles, staring at the wall, and smoking a ciggy.  I touched her arm but she didn't move.  

I said "did saving her break something?"  She said she wasn't sure but we needed to keep moving because they were coming.  And they wouldn't stop until a wrong was righted.  

I walked back into the common area and people were chanting and in dark robes.  My little cousin was in the center smiling on her iPhone.  Lightning was still streaking through the sky. 

And it ended..............

I thought Mardi Gras Parades were over

So maybe giving up alcohol for Lent opened my third eye or something....

Sorry this has been a dream diary lately but these are just too weird. 

This is a short one but it bled into another dream....then..another.... but I'll make 3 posts so it's not too long. 

We were on the Avenue all day. Ladders set up, chairs galore, beads a flying. My co-workers were in town or lived here...I am not sure. The only one I remember for sure was my "mini me".  We have a similar build, blonde hair, short, love the same things...but she is like 28 hahaha. 

Anyways she had her dog with her in in the ladder seat like a kid (no judgement).  But he didn't look like her dog.  He was smaller and only blonde hair not black and blonde.  He didn't want to be in the ladder and kept getting down and going across the street.  It was freaking me out because FLOATS but he was listening and would sit and watch the bands and floats and then come back for a visit then go back.  

I had a horrible feeling about the whole thing but no one else seemed to be concerned.  At one point he looked at us as a band was going by and started to cross.  We yelled no no sit! And he did but he started to walked again right after and we yelled no because the band vehicle was coming.  So he sat and then the band truck started veering towards the crowd for no apparent reason, right towards him and.... lets just say I remember screaming a lot and knew it was bad.  

I jumped off my ladder and ran across the street.  I saw someone pick him up.  People weren't letting me through.  I was yelling I'm friends with his owner.  I don't remember seeing him but I know I looked and he was gone.  

I was crying thinking how am I going to tell her.  I kept saying this wasn't supposed to happen.  We were having fun.  I told her what happened from the ground and she started wailing crying.  I started screaming this wasn't supposed to happen make it rewind.  Make it go back.  I know you can make it go back.  Please just rewind just a little.  Give me a chance to save him. He wasn't supposed to die here.  

I was concentrating REALLY hard....and...it happened.  The dream rewound.  I was back on the ladder, it hadn't happened yet.  But the ladder was suddenly...sentient (WTF).  Picture the brooms in Fantasia but a ladder.  It was "walking" around to get me the best view of the floats.  I was freaking out because I had no control.  Then it was the moment before he was hit.  I jumped off the ladder and ran across the street.  I grabbed him before the vehicle got to him and ran back across the street. 

I handed him to my friend and said you have to keep him in the seat, so she leashed him.  Then lightning streaked across the sky.  It was purple.  The wind picked up.  I was in the middle of the street and the parade was gone but the crowd was still there.  I heard something say I broke the rules. I remember standing next to an overflowing trash can with bright headlights (?) shining on me. 

This is where it ended I think......

"Breaking the law, breaking the law"

That's from something in the naughts (Beavis and Butthead). I didn't actually break the law. But I will set the scene of my crazy dream brain.  This is super long and absolutely bonkers but I have to write it down. 

I was working with law enforcement to catch a criminal.  She was really bad...dangerous...a threat to national security.  I have no idea why I was on this team but I was helping with puzzles to track her down.  We ended up at a university that looked suspiciously like Tulane.  I finished a riddle that lead me to the Library.  I've never been in Tulane's library so I have no idea if this is accurate but I was upstairs walking through the shelves.  It was EMPTY!  Like not a f**king soul in there.

I found her.  She was bent over a table frantically writing something down from a book(?).  She looked up at me and it was Michelle Pfeiffer.  But not like her now.  She looked like Michelle from Grease 2, so baby Michelle.  She looked at me and said something pleading.  It gets super blurry at this point...I don't know what she said but whatever it was changed me.  

The next thing I know we are running out of the library together to a vehicle.  She put a baggy sweatshirt and hat on me and said just act sick, like I'm picking you up.  That's when I realized the whole campus was locked down by armed security.  Not like they were with us looking for her, like it was the "normal" day to day to have AK 47's at the gates checking the identities of students coming in and going out.  

We made it past the gates. As we were driving I recognized some things but many were old landmarks from my childhood that don't exist anymore.  Like the spinning cow you could see from I10, the moving bug bill board.  I think I remember the Castle House in the East.  

I think we ended up in Mississippi...maybe.  I am not sure honestly but the "safe house" we went to was an old school wrecker/junk yard/mechanic business.  It was very run down, two stories with all kinds of equipment around.  When we walked in there were various persons.  Mostly older...like picture the mom from goonies but nicer seemed to be in charge and some older men.  There were a few closer to our age. They called Michelle "Stephanie" which is hilarious because that's her name in Grease 2 (lol).  

The peeps there were not happy she had me.  They were like she's a plant, she's going to get us all caught.  But Stephanie vouched for me.  She said we needed to GTFO though and quickly.  She needed something from a store down the street so we walked.  As we were walking we see Slidell PD patrolling everywhere (so not quite MS).  That's when we realize, they can track my phone and watch.  So we dump them.  I went to the trees/creek/marsh to drop them in the water and she went get whatever she needed.  We met back at the house but police were showing up. 

*******I woke up here...literally got up...went pee thought...why the hell am I dreaming about Michelle Pfeiffer...and laid back down....*******

Then the effing dream CONTINUED...what is happening!??!?!?!    We went inside and there were like 15 hispanic people in there (I don't know why) and my husband (?).  The safe house peeps were like act cool, just answer their questions.  You are refugees they can't take you.  So we sat huddled in the living room while these gestapo-esque people walk in.  They have HUGE guns and a $hit attitude.  They wanted to know where our final destination was.  We pretended not to speak English (well I pretended...the reset may not have I dunno).  So they handed us magazine pages and said write your final address.  

I was like WTF, I am not prepared what do I write.  And some voice in my head said St. Augustine, FL (what?!?!)  So I made up an address and a street and put St. Augustine, FL.  But the magazine paper was slick and the pen was having issues writing.  Finally one of them just snatched it out of my hand because I was taking too long.  I shied away scared and they just walked away and said not to go far, they'd be back tomorrow after they verify our addresses ($hit $hit $hit #$hit).

Everyone scattered and Stephanie was prepping our bug out vehicle and supplies.  We had to dump the other car because they knew it because of my phone (?).  So she told me to take a walk, get some air because it was about to get crazier. 

I wandered across a field and ended up at a horse race (WTAF is going on here). Everything was free (Odd) and honestly kinda cool.  I had been gone a minute so I decided to walk back and realized I was hella lost.  I couldn't figure out where I was.  So I asked the girls MC-ing, they looked nice.  

I said the name of the Wrecker place (which eludes me now) and the girls were like "Oh no baby that place is sketchy!  You do not want to go there!!!"  Thinking on my feet I said they had my car though.  The girls were like "OMG why?  Wait is it a..." and they made motions like shifting.  I said yes its manual and they said "We understand" and hugged me really tight.  They sent me on my way.  As I was walking I realized I had a phone in my hand (how the hell??!?!).  It wasn't mine but it was logged into my google account.  I freaked out because TRACKING and threw it in another canal/ditch thing.  

I made it back to safe house and everyone was on the 3rd floor (wait there are 3 floors?!?!?) in a modified 18 wheeler missing the top watching something down the street.  I climbed in also and it swung out away from the building.  I panicked and the older woman said don't worry it's on a J-Hook crane and can hold us. 

I literally went "What??!?" and mumbled "yea this could only work in a dream". EVERYONE stopped and looked at me ($hit). Like it was a creepy eveyone looked at me in unison, confused, like "she's aware". 

*******I woke up again here... I rolled over and said...well that was hella weird...snuggled with Little Bit and went back to sleep....*******

IT KEPT GOING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stephanie was packing the GTFO vehicle with supplies.  She had clothes for me and hubs.  And ALOT of cash.  We told everyone bye and left.  It was night time. We drove for HOURS.  She wouldn't let us drive, we couldn't know where we were going just in case.  

We finally stopped at some shady looking motel in a swamp(?).  It had a screened in porch that went all the way around.  We were there for more than one day I think.  She encouraged us to walk around and get fresh air (seriously what is going on with the fresh air walking).  I remember walking near a swampy bank and seeing an alligator but I wasn't scared.  I was like hey friend.  Anyways, as I am walking back to the motel with hubs his phone rings.  Oh no we didn't dump his phone and watch!!! I am scared to tell him what we have to do but he was super ok with it.  

So into the swamp it goes.  We get back to the motel and we are like we have to leave we forgot about his phone and watch.  She was like ok let me finish this.  I don't know what she was doing but it looked...ceremonial.  It jumped a little and we are running back to the car.  She told me to just leave the keys but we decided to let them know we were leaving so I run into the office where three men are watching soccer on an OLD SCHOOL tiny box TV.  They were like "what??????"  I said we have to leave family emergency and threw the key.  They said we paid for more days but I was already running out the door.  

We were at another motel/B&B(?).  She was like we need to conserve as much money as we can.  So she is teaching my hubs how to confuse change....  like Here's a $50, now give me $20, oh now I owe you $100, now give me $175 back.   You know stealing basically.  And the poor clerk was like wait...ok...no...yes.  Whatever at this point I recalled she'd been teaching us all along how to be creatively frugal without actually hurting anyone.  

Here is where it gets wonky.  I know we were there for a bit, then SOOO MUCH DRIVING.  Like weeks of it.  So I feel like we were criss-crossing the country.  Making stops along the way to get....I have no idea.  At some point I was told final destination is Tallahassee, FL. 

We were being pursued by some three letter agency we were all running on very little sleep and caffeine.  I know we were close to FL if not in FL.  I remember it was night, flashing lights and panic.  She said something about you can't give up.  She was shaking me by the shoulders. Blue eyes boring into me. You can't stop.  You have to get the truth.  We need the truth.  The truth is all that matters now.  

And that's it.  I don't know what it means but I am kinda freaked out on many levels.  I went from helping the law to breaking it for the greater good.  WHAT!?!?!?!?

Jazzland the Resurrection....???

The other dream jumped here.  I was driving around SE LA with work bestie and my twin besties.  Apparently they were along for the ride (?).  

It was a small old model Ford car and while I know it was daytime, everything was muted.  Like colors weren't as vibrant.  I don't know if it was over multiple days or not but I know we  met with a few people but it was only like 10:00AM and our next meeting wasn't until 2:30PM so we had some time to kill. 

Of all the places for us to be having meetings...we were in New Orleans East (WTAF).  One of the twins suggested we go to Jazzland to kill some time.  Ya know the NOLA Themed Amusement Park that was sold to Six Flags and has been defunct and abandoned since Katrina!!!

Except in my dream it was still open so we got a day pass.  As we walked through the gates everything turned vibrant.  Picture Wizard of Oz when Dorothy goes from Kansas to Oz.  It wasn't too crowded but had a lot of people for a middle of the day weekday.  So we were walking around and work bestie was like this place is small but really neat.  

The twins beelined it for a "haunted egyption" ride and me and bestie wandered to another area.  He nudged me to look at a "Top Gun" ride that launched you up a zip line like a fighter jet.  It was a two person single car thing and made the jet noises.  But I ended up walking over to this slide thing.  Like you got in a inner tube type thing and loop de looed all over the place.  No shoes of course so we removed our shoes and went up. I somehow got tangled in the crochet tube (WTF) and went down weird but it was super fun.

When I got to the bottom the twins were waiting and like "where are your shoes" so we went on the hunt for them.  They weren't in lockers....the were like tossed around in what looked like a living room.  I was panicking because I really liked my shoes.  Then I found them... they were my Doc Martins.  Why I would be wearing those for work meetings is beyond me.

I put them on and we realized we lost Bestie.  It was early afternoon and we needed to get to the next meeting.  But instead of them herding us (like a huge group of people) back into the park, we were herded into like a banquet hall and a private party was happening so they herded us down a barely lit hallway that reminded me of the Haunted Mansion or tower of terror ride and before we knew it we were outside the gates. 

I managed to keep track of the twins but we needed to find my friend.  So I tried calling but couldn't get him.  This was weird.  Like I knew something was very wrong because he wouldn't just leave us.  They wouldn't let us back in even with the day pass armband so we had them page him over the PA.  And I remember saying "oh he's gonna love that!".  

Hours went by and he didn't show and I was freaking out a little and so were the twins.  After nightfall they were doing some sort of show that reminded me a bit of Halloween Horror Nights.  Like we could see the pyrotechnics and hear the actors from outside.  Finally around 8PM we snuck in with another group to go find him.  The twins kept saying "he wouldn't just leave us!".  

I ended up in some theater with a bunch of people looking at a stage.  I honestly don't know what happened but they started screaming and a hand would burst from their lower abdomen/pelvic area and slap their stomach.  Then a brand that looked like a clawed hand would appear.  I have never run so fast in my life.  What in the devil worship insanity is happening?!?!?!

I ran into the haunted egypt ride and was being chased by these people with brands yelling for me to join them and hissing (WTAF).  I don't know what happened but something occured in the egypt ride and a "higher" being poured blood over me and crowned me queen.  That's when I saw the twins and they both had smaller crowns and lace (?) dresses.  The blood turned into an intricate design of a dress and streaked my hair with red highlights.  The higher being looked like princess Diana but with dark makeup and a fitted to flowing black and red gown.  

She said we needed to leave now and at this point I was almost in tears, I can't find my friend!!!! She looked at me and said she had saved someone from the branded group...a sacrifice.  She "anointed" him something but he was not very cooperative.  They brought him out in chains. It was bestie.  He had a black eye and a gash on his head.  His long sleeve button up was torn from the shoulders so it was sleeveless and he also had the "blood designs" on him.  He looked ready to murder someone until he saw us.  Lots of hugs and OMG are you okays later and we were being escorted out of the park by the higher being and her entourage.  She was talking about how she was so happy she was able to ascend the queen (what?!).  And I was like "what about the other chick that ascended???"  

This made the higher being freeze.  She said "what other chick?".  I explained that during the branding in the theater another woman was on stage and they were crowning her because I was running away. She started laughing but like a "are you f**king kidding me" laugh.  Then she said "you must leave now. Another queen should not have been crowned.  You and your knight are in danger".  Knight?!?!!?!?!?

So we head to the rental in an EMPTY parking lot.  Where the f**k is everyone?!?! The twins are like "are we royalty now???  What the f**k just happened???".  Its insanely late and pitch black.  Like almost no lights except the moon. He gets the car started and the green lights on the display say 2AM.  We were in there 6 hours....how??!!?  

Then bestie in his truest fashion goes "I don't know...but I am really pissed we missed that only happens every 7 years meeting".  What?!?!?!  1. He's not even been with our company 7 years! Hell, I just made 7 years!!!! and 2. did you forget about the sacrifice blood magic queen and knight thing?!?!?!

Never go into the dark woods

I am 99% sure we were at my friend's dad's camp in the dream but it also seemed like a campground we have all been to many times..

It was a HUGE plantation style house and my whole friend group with spouses plus our tall blonde with the camp were staying. The house was at the edge of a lagoon.  And all around the lagoon was a pebbled concrete path that reminded me a bit of a park.  

It had so many rooms.  It wasn't really an open layout there was a door to each room whether it was bed, living, kitchen, den, dining, etc. each had a door.  And there was lots of...stuff.  Like decor...it looked very well loved.

The weather was bouncing between sunny and storming.  I know it jumped around a few days because I remember one night when it was storming and I couldn't find my way around.  Like the lights were on and I was in a room at the top floor trying to get down and all the hallways just kept going.  So I stopped and went on the wrap around balcony and it was so dark but the moon was peaking through the clouds. 

Then I was laying out by the water...on the concrete when my PnC came out with a cocktail and was like why do you only have 6 Nutrls we are going to be here for 8 days or something like that.  So one of my twins was like let's go to the store and see what we can get you. 

So we went in to change.  While we were inside the water got "rough" and the other twin was pickup our stuff because the water was coming over the edge of the walkway.  We went to leave and I had on the jankiest flip flops that felt like they were about to snap and running shorts.  As we walked out tall blonde came in and I realized I really hadn't seen her.  She was staying in the master bedroom.  She kinda zoomed past with a quick hey and closed the door which then seemed to pull really far away down a hall.  

Note - I feel like this means something other than weird brain dream as she has in reality pulled away from everyone and we never see her. 

Anyways me and one twin started walking INTO THE WOODS to get to the store and were talking about how we should do this more often.  It wasn't terribly hot but the woods looked dark, like unaturaly dark. And I felt like we really shouldn't go in there.  Like as we walked into the canopy I was getting very nervous. 

Then it switched.  

Popcorn+Wine for dinner = Dead people (?) and a Tsunami

The 1st thing I remember is it was night time.  Like 8 or 9 PM.  I was in my little Mazda and was going to deliver sorted cards to my "new" contact at public safety.  But I was bringing them to his house.  He lived in an apartment building.  I was driving around what looked like Uptown New Orleans looking for this "complex".  It had a horseshoe driveway and looked almost like Notre Dame Seminary on Carrolton. At some point I remember thinking I should call him and make sure he's home (LOL what?!?!).

There were a TON of cars in various states of disrepair so no parking.  I found a spot on this weird stretch of Neutral ground where others were parking.  I couldn't find the apartment, 8-XXX.  I can't remember the rest of the number now but I remember the 8.  I realized as I was walking around the 8 was the building number and I was parked in front of Building 4.  

There were people EVERYWHERE but they weren't paying attention to me.  They were all very...dark.  I don't know how to explain it.  Like they weren't all dark skinned...just like in shadow and gave me the heebies.  I headed back to my car to get the cards and the dream shifted to a memory.  But a "Dream" memory.  

In the memory, I was going to my "old" contact's townhouse to drop off the sorted cards.  She lived with her husband and I missed her dearly.  She passed away (she has passed away in reality).  I was in her townhouse. It was very 80's with the brown tones and wood paneling.  She gave me the biggest hug and told me she always looked forward to my visits. She had dinner for us to enjoy together but her husband wasn't home yet.  There was lots of chatting and laughing.  It felt so good to be with her.

Then I was back at my car getting the GARBAGE bag out (in reality it would have been very organized boxes).  Some people I knew saw me and said they would walk with me to building 8 since they were going to a party at building 15.  The girl didn't want me going by myself...she was very worried about me being alone with all these people out.  The bag was heavy but we were making our way around.  These people were like in a trance moving around almost in a daze...and like I said, shadowed.  We were "bright".  The shadowed people didn't move out of the way.  It was like they didn't really see us.  I really felt like we didn't belong and I knew if I touched one it would be bad. 

Then I was back in my car driving around New Orleans in the early morning but like an exaggerated, weird AF version of the streets.  Things looped around to nowhere.  If you weren't careful you ended up on a bridge that went (?) to I don't know where but I was terrified of going over it.  It was really tall and the otherside was dark as heck. 

I was on what I think was Tchoupitoulas Street but it had a "street car" and was even more narrow than it actually is.  I went through a tunnel (WTF) and my GPS was like "Nah B may a u-ey".  But the U-turn took me back into the tunnel and there were tracks for the street car and I didn't think I was supposed to go in there.  So I was waiting outside of it and I saw a light and was like "I knew it, there is a train".  Seriously what is happening?!?!? People already in the tunnel moved to the side of the walls (WTF) and the "train" shot out of the tunnel but it was a model train like the ones my brother used to have. 

It jumped again and I was bringing breakfast to to my work bestie's house.  The "new" contact from Public Safety was with me and another guy that was shortish, fit, older with white hair and a white beard.  My bestie lived in an attached house....like it was a house attached to another house....  He answered the door in jeans and an undershirt.  It was like 7AM or something.  I was like sorry for the early hour but we have brekkie. 

He was grumpy and said he needed coffee but let us in.  He swiped his hand dramatically over his head and eyes (he is lacking in the hair dept) and glared at the two men behind me.  He said his family had already left for the day.  It was a tiny kitchen with a table in the middle to fit 5, like short rectangle.  But it had a lot of stuff on it.  It reminded me of the table at my grandparents house...ALWAYS covered in crap.  

We sat down to eat and before I could cook the chicken bites one of the other guys put a piece of raw chicken on bread and ate it (AHHHHHHH!).  Anyways, I grabbed the rest and popped it in the oven.  

It jumped again and the table was gone and there was a mattress in the middle of the kitchen and an old small box TV on a stand.  Bestie was like "I sleep in here sometimes" (WUT?!?!?).  I was sitting on the counter and felt the sink move.....so I moved over because the sink was detaching from the counter. Dude with the white beard went to use the sink and I said "be careful his house is breaking".

I somehow fell asleep in the dream and woke up snuggled with "new" contact and when we woke up we jumped apart like whoa whoa WTF?!?!  Bestie was FUMING.  He was like "don't touch her!".  And pulled me off the counter.  Then we realized we were late for something and left.   

We were standing outside his front door when we heard sirens.  It was a Tsunami warning (WHAT?!!?).  When I looked up, I could see the pacific ocean about a mile away and a HUGE wave coming at us.  We started running for higher ground and as I was running up this HUGE hill I thought "we don't have hills in NOLA!!!".   As I looked back at the wave coming at us I realized we weren't high enough.  It was on land now and I could see people in the distance being flung off their safe perches by the water.  

We turned right and there was a STEEP grass covered bigger "hill" going higher so we booked it up that hill.  All four of us were together.  We collapsed at the top as the wave surged below us.  I was leaning against a rock or something next to bestie and he was looking away.  We were celebrating that we made it but I noticed he wouldn't look at me.  I said his name and he looked at me with red rimmed eyes, tears covering the blue and spilling down.  And I realized his home was down there and said "Oh _____ I am so sorry" and I tried to give him a hug but he said "No, don't...you can't hug me when I am like this".  So I placed my hand on his arm and he broke down crying and then fell into me.  So I hugged him and said "Shhh, its ok. Its going to be ok.  They are ok.".  I looked at my phone (which was like an old school silver panasonic with a keypad and a small screen) to make a call and realized I didn't have service.  

No, not the sexy kind, I’m just weird

I can’t tell peeps they were in my dreams because they always think “brown chicken brown cow” and it’s more like “nah B you were having an in person meeting in my bathroom.”

So we were in like an old NOLA raised house.  Like one side of a double.  I’m not sure whose house I imagined but you went up about 6 steps to the front door.  Once inside there was a living room, a rather large living room that lead into an eating/dining are.  There were double doors that lead into a decent sized kitchen.  Off the living room to the right was a little hallway.  As you turned the middle door facing the living room was the bathroom.  On either side was a bedroom.  

Now it wasn’t really furnished from what I remember.  There was a sofa, chair, coffee table, TV stand and TV. The dining area didn’t have a table.  

It was me and my husband in the living room waiting for someone or a few someones.  Hubs was sick (which he actually is at the moment).  My coworker bestie walked in with his brief case.  He’s kinda short so with heels on I am at eye level with him.  He was like “XYZ will be here in a few minutes.”  Another coworker….we’ll call him frat boy bc he reminds me of a frat boy and he shares a name with my little brother.  Anyways he shows up but like I can’t see him clearly, I just know he is there.  Hubs was in his work gear and was like I gotta run and left. 

An older woman with short gray hair and a flower dress walks in.  She was kind of tiny but I remember she had kind eyes.  Bestie leads her to my bathroom where there is now a Desk and two chairs (WTF?!?). We sit and he starts this meeting.  It was going really well.  As we are talking I get a tickle in my throat and excuse myself.  I go through the double doors into a dark kitchen to cough.  

JI didn’t want to interrupt his sales pitch so I just hung out for a sec.  But then I was like “Crap I gotta pee” and then “Ugh he’s in the bathroom!”. I even remember thinking in the dream “why is he meeting with her in my bathroom?!?!?”

It jumped ahead and we went into the backyard where there was a fairly large pool, pool house, deck, and a decent green swatch of yard over to the right. I don’t know why we vacated to the pool house after she left but it was me, bestie, and a friend of mine.  But I can’t remember who just she was about my size and a friend.  She had a blanket on top of her head and wrapped around her. We recapped the meeting saying it went well etc.  

We walked back out to the yard/pool area and my dad had arrived with my grandmother (deceased) and my godmother. They were sitting at a black wrought iron table.  We started talking and my bestie started walking around the pool.  I went to kiss everyone hello and my Godmother stopped me and was like “I’m not feeling well”.  I was laying on the ground in the sun with my friend in the blanket.  I remember I did something and she said “I said stop” and then leaned over and kissed me on my forehead.  

I was talking with my dad when bestie walked up and I was like “hey bestie, this is my dad, grandmother, and godmother.” He seemed a little nervous but was very nice.  I asked if he was getting his steps in, because we are doing a step challenge at work.  Like we literally are right now hahaha.  He said yes and he didn’t want to intrude on my family time.  I said never, you are basically family at this point.  My dad mentioned lunch.  My grandmother got excited and said “Mandinas!  I haven’t been there in years!”  

Which I mean if we are being real…is true since she passed in 2019.  Bestie was a little sweaty from getting his steps and it being effing NOLA and 8 millions degrees out.  I reached up and grabbed besties hand to help me up.   

Then he held onto my hand (like in a platonic way…like when I hold my girlfriends hands), leaned over, and was like “are you sure it’s ok for me to come to lunch???”   And my grandmother gave him this look like “don’t be stupid” and started clapping and said “yes!  I am so excited for lunch!”

That's not your job!!!

So I had another weirdly vivid dream.  

What I remember.  I was working on a base(?).  Things weren't good.  Something had happened and society was a $hittier show. I was in army camo stuff and I had on one of those hats... like this. 

I was in charge of peace.  Basically playing mediator because people suck and don't know how to act human.  But I was also doing like 10 other jobs.  My work partner (a guy) kept yelling at me to stop.  He would loud cap me in front of others about things I shouldn't be doing.  We were equals and I kinda knew him I think.  Like in the dream I knew we were friends before whatever happened.  But now that we were here we fought A LOT.   Like I wasn't even sure we were friends anymore because he was so mean to me all the time.

I hated it because I didn't understand why my partner/friend was being like this towards me.  Why he felt the need to do any of this. 

Since I was a peacekeeper I usually didn't say anything back just rolled my eyes.  After a harrowing day...I think I broke up a fight and helped someone sign up for food rations (?)...he loud capped me about how the food rations weren't my responsibility.   

I had HAD it. I fired back at him saying something along the lines of "they needed help. what was I supposed to do just ignore them?!?!  Tell them to go queue over there and hope @$$hat #10 who didn't help before helps them this time????  These people are scared and hungry what the f**k do you want from me!??!!?" and I stormed out of the room. 

I was in a bathroom...I think.  I was leaning on a counter trying not to have an anxiety attack.  The lighting was very...sterile if that makes sense.  Anyways I was trying to breathe when I felt someone come up behind me.  I was about to whirl around to fight when they grabbed me by the waist, pinning my back to their front, and leaned in next to my ear.  His cheek rubbed against mine.  His skin...the stubble...it felt strangely familiar.  

"I only do this to protect you.  We all have jobs and responsibilities and more than half of what you do isn't your job.  I am trying to protect you.  Please, try to understand, it's because I care.  I care so much but no one can know how much."

I broke, started crying, and said "I thought you hated me".  He held me super tight and nuzzled into my neck apologizing over and over. 

It jumps ahead, we still fight a lot.  I've become closer with some of the others (men & women).  We bond over all the crap we get from my partner.  We are all outside...a bunch of other soldiers (?) on a mission (?).  It's storming because I think we f**ked up the Earth so much she doesn't know what to do anymore.  We needed to get across the base.  But it's like...borderline monsoon...heavy heavy rain.  

I'm like f**k it and take off running.  Everyone seems to follow.  Someone grabs my hand and is running next to me.  It's my partner.  He has my hand in a vice grip but not painful.  We are running and I yelled "I thought people couldn't know you cared?".  He didn't say anything.  We could barely see a foot in front of us, navigating by memory but we could hear other boots splashing around us.  

We slowed slightly and the boots passed us I think.  He suddenly stops and turns me towards him. He practically yells (because of the storm) "I don't care what they think. I'm tired of us not being us.  I'm tired of you looking hurt because of me.  I'm tired of missing you.  I'm tired of being jealous of the time they get with you. I'm tired of pretending you aren't my world".

**record scratch**

WHAT?!?!  I couldn't see his face.  Just the shadow from his hat and the rain pouring around us. Me being me...who cracks jokes when I am nervous or uncomfortable said "Why do I feel like you are going to kiss me in the rain now?" (nervous laugh).

He said "Would you like that?" and kissed me, like REALLY KISSED ME. Everything was spinning.  I was dizzy, confused, cold, scared but I was safe in his arms. I heard whooping & whistling from somewhere in the distance....that's when I realized the rain had stopped and we had an audience.  He leaned into my ear and whispered "I love you". 

I think I need to lay off the Enemies to Lovers books!!!!!!!!

I had a dream...I think

So I stayed with family for a few days recently.  It was great, I love them, they love me, a good time was had by all.  Now I have stayed here before but not particularly in the room I stayed in. 

It's a nice room, comfy bed, TV, etc.  

1st night, I was out cold...I was exhausted.  When I am away from home I sleep with the TV on and a sleep mask because...I dunno actually. 

Anyways, I had a very vivid dream.  In the dream I woke up in the room. I could see the TV light through my sleep mask.  The room was FREEZING! As I was trying to go back to sleep (in the dream) it felt like the bed depressed on the other side. I distinctly felt someone lean closer to my side and on my pillow.   I could feel someone next to my right ear and I was FREAKING out.  I couldn't really move but I could feel something by my right ear. I think I heard words but was so panicked I have no idea what they were. 

I was finally able to jerk awake and the TV clicked off as I was pulling the mask off.  Weird.  I was kinda freaked out so I turned it back on and tried to settle down.  

A little while later I had the same dream.  Everything was exactly the same except this time I heard "its ok, I'm family".  My racing heart started to calm down.  I wasn't scared anymore. It felt like someone was stroking my hair and I felt, safe.  I didn't recognize the voice but it felt/sounded male. As I calmed down, I dozed off. 

The thing is how could I doze back off...if I was already sleeping?!?!  Was I sleeping...? I slept there 2 more nights and didn't have the "dream" again but I did wake up both nights at 2:47 AM and 5:03 AM.  Both "nights", same time.  I woke up FREEZING, pulled the mask off, rolled over and went back to sleep.  

I gotta go back, back, back to school again

My subconscious is unhinged.  In this episode of WTF we go back to High School. 

My memory of this dream begins with me (at the age I am now) walking through the halls of my High School. It's familiar but not.  I've been back to the school recently and its very modern and updated.  But I feel really short.  Or like everything is bigger?  Not sure.  

So I am in my 40's back in high school...what is happening?  So I am walking with books in my arms trying to find my classes.  Seriously WTF is going on. 

The first class I went to was psychology (that checks out for me).  In my class I recognize a bunch of girls that I went to HS with, and guys I knew in HS, along with one girl I am still close with but she went to another HS.  She told me "if I'm doing HS again, I am doing it with y'all!".  Then there are a bunch of guys (weird, I went to an all girls school) and girls I don't recognize. The ones I didn't know all looked at me, like stared, as I walked in (WTF). 

The next class was upstairs but the stairs were HUGE and there was no railing so I was having an issue going up the stairs. When I get close to the top, the top two stairs flatten out into a ramp and I can't get up it.  The teacher (in robes) told a girl at the top to help me.  She is tugging my arm (not very helpful) and says "I can't she's too fat!"  again WTF.  

This class is in an auditorium (which my HS doesn't have).  It was astronomy.  And I sat in the back but the teacher kept calling on me and making me uncomfortable because the people in the class I didn't know were the ones watching me.  The people I knew were looking down taking notes.  

It skipped around a bit and I was at a tiki bar (?) with hubs and a bunch of peeps from school.  I was introducing him to my HS friends and we were playing pool...I think.  It was a weird game but looked like pool.  

We walked up to the bar to get a drink and I knew two of the guys at the bar.  But they weren't people from HS or any of the peeps from dream school I didn't know. I knew them from school in the dream but like also knew them knew them... it was weird.  So we are waiting for our drinks and the guy closest to me is teasing me about something and nudging me.  Hubs was like what is going on and I explain whatever the joke is and he was like "y'all are weird".  As we are all talking I keep thinking "I know him.  I know him.  Who is this".  But I couldn't see his face.  It was like a tickle in my brain.  

The other guy was talking to hubs over us about football or something.  And the one closest to me was like "I'm worried about you."  What, why?!?!?!  I was leaning on my elbows on the bar and I distinctly remember him putting his hand on my arm and saying "you need to be careful, please promise me you'll be careful".  And that's when I really focused on his hands.  He had smallish hands for a guy, a black.gray wedding ring, hairy arms, and tanish skin.  Why does this look familiar?!?!?!?!?  I don't usually remember people's f**king hands, who is this??!?!

Something happens behind us and I am knocked into hubs.  He puts his arms around me and when I look back to the guy next to me I see something, but its blurry, like I can't focus.  I see light eyes looking sad.  He grabs my hand and says "did you hear me, you need to be careful!  They are watching you." What?!?!  Who??!!?!? And then I recognize the voice. I know that voice.  I talk with that voice almost daily.  We work together.  We are friends.  Why can't I see you?!?!!?  

It jumps again and I am back in school.  It's like an art class or a lab...I can't tell, there are two people to a table.  I recognize some people but then there are those "Others".  I still don't know why we all had to go back to school but its not normal school.  Something is different.  

The teacher tells us to get into groups of four.  The girl at my table I have known since 1st grade.  She hops up and goes to our other friends we all went to grammar school with. I am odd man out but there is a table of "others" behind me that need another person.  Its two guys and a girl.  One guy was blonde, tall and muscular skinny.  The other was dark haired, and more broad muscular.  The girl had long wavy red hair and was VERY pretty.  Honestly all stupidly attractive. So I join them.  

They looked almost goth but not...also kinda grunge.  It's hard to explain. They were actually VERY accepting but were also some of the ones that just kinda stared at me in other classes.  We were doing some sort of group project and kinda became friends (?).  They'd told me things.  I don't remember the things but I know I knew secrets I shouldn't know. It jumped again and we were at someones house.  But it was older.  Like looked like a house from the late 80's, early 90's.  

This group project was some sort of magic (?) but the peeps in my group were very certain the teacher was up to something and it was dark magic.  It was bad and we needed to stop.  But if we didn't do the project we'd fail.  If we failed we would be put in a "camp" (seriously WTAF).  

The blonde was acting the weirdest of all.  Apparently we'd become very close. He had stormed off and the others were like, He'll only listen to you.  So I followed him into a dark room.  I couldn't see anything and he said from the darkness, you shouldn't be here.  What if I hurt you.  And I said "you wouldn't hurt me".  

He pinned me against a wall with unnatural speed.  He leaned into my personal space and almost growled "are you scared yet?".  And I said "I'm not scared of you".  He leaned in next to my left ear and said "you should be". And then sank his fangs into my neck. 

I woke up but not in a panic.  I still wasn't scared.  Because the feeling I felt when he bit me wasn't fear.  It was like I was helping a friend.

So that is my weird @$$ dream of the month.  It's a lot to unpack...not even gonna try right now.  

Just call me Mary Poppins y’all

I guess this is Part 2 or “The end”, since I called the other one the beginning.  

We left off with a friend dragging me away from my grandparents house and ending up on a hill looking at a two story blue siding and brick house.  He grabbed my hand and said “You’ll be safe with us”.  

We started walking towards the house and that is when I realized it was actually two houses SUPER close together.  Like their front porches were almost touching. I turned to my companion and was like “bruh why you built so close to this other house?!?” And he said something about saving money. 

We went inside and he said “I can’t wait for you to meet *insert wife’s name*”.  As soon as he said her name, I realized who he was.  He was MY friend.  We work together.  How didn’t I recognize him before?!!? He’s just a smidge taller than me…I would know him anywhere!

I could hear kids playing someplace and I heard someone call out his name from the other room.  Now I’ve never in person met my friend’s wife.  I see pictures on social media but that’s all.  So he guides me into like a kitchen/breakfast area and there is his wife but like she looked different than pics but still I knew it was her.  She seemed surprised to see me so he told her something about how I was in danger and needed to stay with them.  He left out the whole party at my grandparents house turning into a literal nightmare. 

She was incredibly nice and asked if I needed to rest.  I told her yes and was brought to a spare room where I was immediately “attacked” by 3 children.  Again never met the kids but I know a lot about them from him.  I was their new friend apparently.  

It jumped around a bit but I was there for a while. At least it felt like some time was passing.  I played ALOT with the kids.  I distinctly remember running around with them playing like hide and seek or something and all of us getting fussed at for being “wild”.  Which is hilarious because I know I am older than both my friend and his wifey.  

At one point I was in like a hallway with a doorway into the back of the kitchen.  But the door way was kind of small.  Like a child could walk through it but an adult would have to duck.  My friend found me and we were talking and I asked about the small doorway.  He said the house came that way and the builder said they weren’t allowed to make it bigger (WTAF).  He said he hit his head on it regularly.  But he didn’t like to use it…because it didn’t feel right.  

I am not sure the dynamic but I think I may have become like a Nanny for them. We were as close as ever and I became really close with his wife.  Like we had alot to talk about but for the life of me I cant remember any of it.  One night they were about to go out with friends.  These friends came over, two couples.  One of the women was a tall African American woman.  I recognized her but not sure from where but my friends were like “Oh y’all know each other!”.  

They were panicking because the babysitter didn’t show up. And I was like I can stay home with the kids.  That’s what y’all have me for.  Plus I don't have anything to wear to dinner that looks fancy enough.  This is when I noticed everyone was in like formal attire and I was in like a cute dress but not nearly dressy enough.

My friend was like no, you are supposed to come with us.  You have to come with us.  You can’t stay alone, its not safe, that’s not how this works.  That creepy feeling from the last dream came back.  Like I didn’t know I was dreaming, so not a lucid dream but the unsafe feeling came back.  

My friends wife was like we should just stay in, we have the movie room! I was so confused, they were dressed for like a ball, not a night in with movies and pizza.  She looked…scared.  He looked concerned and I realized I had three kids hugging me, like they were scared they’d never see me again.  

That’s when I noticed the sound.  Not wind, not weather…but a low growling howling.  It was dark outside but not like night…unnaturally dark. I didn’t feel safe anymore.  I started to have a panic attack (not something that happens to me often).  

My friend grabbed me by the shoulders and looked into my eyes and said we have to go. He has very distinct eyes, like he was looking through me…it was weird.  He said  I’ll see you next time. And hugged me incredibly tight.

that’s the end.

So I dunno what the hell I ate last night but this is what my subconscious came up with.  

What is my brain trying to tell me

Yet another dream….shocking!  I’ve not dreamt about my friend (who needs to get out of his own head) in a while but I did last night.  Nothing crazy but he was in it.  

We were at the beach.  I think it was a trip but it almost seemed like a work thing/mini vacay.   There was a HUGE property you could walk to from the hotel we were staying at.  There were 4 of us (2 girls, 2 guys)and we were having the best time.  

It skipped around some but I know we went to some presentations and met with others but we always always went to dinner together and hung out after.  There was this one Italian place where the other girl made friends with the chef and we were convinced they were gonna hook up.   

I know we walked on the beach a lot and drank (not in excess) and honestly just had fun.  Nothing nefarious was going on.  Me and my friend we normal again and it was so incredibly nice.  Our last night we decided to go to a different restaurant and were messing with the other girl that we would have to stop by and tell her boy bye to lessen the heart break.  

While we were waiting for a table by the water we went outside to the boardwalk to just enjoy the sunset.  My friend came up next to me and wanted to take a selfie it was innocent and sweet.  Just two friends taking a photo.  I remember looking at it and being so happy we were back to normal!!!

The other two came out and we took another pic.  They called our name for the table and we started to head in.  My friend stopped me and was like we are gonna miss the sunset!!!  So I stayed out with him to watch it.  It was stunning.  So many colors and setting over the water.  Just beautiful!  

I looked over and he was staring at me again and I was like “wut?”  He said he was glad I stuck around and didn’t hate him.  Bruh why would I hate you, you’re like my stardust mate or something.  He put his arm over my shoulder (friendly) and I felt something on my temple.  He gave me the most platonic kiss on the temple and said “I missed you”.

Then I woke up.  

Ever wonder if you slipped into a different reality in your sleep?!?!?!

So I am close with a few persons of the male gender.  Like we are legit friends.  Most, I am friends with their wives/sig others.  That is all we will ever be and we are super close.  Like we are basically  inseparable and know almost everything there is to know about each other.  

Well last night I had a dream.  And when I woke up I legit went "no...no...NO NO NO!"

We were in a tropical climate.  It wasn't NOLA, I know that.  But it was warm and LOTS of water and LOTS of bridges.  Something was wrong.  Think like Day After Tomorrow WRONG.  

We were at work I think and it was raining REALLY REALLY hard.  At some point about 10 of us decided we needed to leave but it was some place where we didn't need a vehicle so we left on foot.. WTAF.  As we were walking we could see islands in the distance.  The islands had volcanoes exploding.  But like...each one was exploding in a ....face?  One looked like it had devil horns, one was a "normal" face, and so on.  I was very nervous.  Like I knew something was very wrong and we were in terrible danger.  As we are running along the coast I was falling behind.  My work bestie grabbed my hand so I would keep up with him. Look I am short...."fast" on a good day....I was struggling. 

We made it to a bunker but it was under ground.  I was FREAKING OUT. I kept saying we shouldn't be below sea level.  Something is wrong.  We need to go higher!!!!  We were trying to get to our families for f**ks sake.  But no one would listen.

My friend and a few others seemed to be on the same page as me.  We opted to leave the bunker and hop into a Bronco with the the dude from Hawaii Five-0.  What.is.happening?!?!?!

Legit haven't watched that show in 5 years but okay brain.  So we are in this old @$$ Bronco driving across this ONE LANE bridge as waves of water crash OVER the bridge.  I am talking Tsunami kind of waves.  So dreams work nothing like reality.  A 30 ft wave would FLOAT the vehicle and we'd somehow land back on the bridge because he had been driving this bridge his whole life.  

Well one wave was too much and knocked us off just enough that we didn't land back on the bridge and were spun around into some canal thing.  I started to roll down the window to jump out and this f**ker told me to roll it back up because his way would give us more time before the car sunk. 

Well his way sucked and we were suddenly plummeting into the dark depths. I blacked out and when I came to I was looking up at my work bestie.  He started crying and hugging me and mumbling something into my neck.    

We were now on foot and it was just the two of us.  We were hiking across scorched but wet lands.  He was dragging me by they hand.  I kept saying "Leave me, You need to get home!"  But he wouldn't leave me.  He said  I love you and you are coming home with me!  

What....what?!?!  I mean yes I love all my friends.  That is nothing weird but I am holding you back and you could die.... LEAVE ME. Also we have never officially said "love you boo boo"

We were hitting dead ends at every turn.  He was getting visibly more scared but had my hand in a death grip. I was hurt and exhausted.  I was keeping him from escaping. I said  "please.  Please just leave me I can't go anymore".  

His beautiful blue eyes were scared, frantic.  I said "go home! *wife* is waiting for you" 

He grabbed me by the shoulders and said "You are coming home too!  Plus *wife* would kill me if I left you, I think she loves you more than me!"

So we ran...and ran....and ran.  I finally collapsed from exhaustion.  He lifted me back to my feet.  I again begged him to leave me.  He grabbed my face and said "never", then kissed me.  Nothing sweet or romantic.  It was desperate, rough, scared but full of emotion.  He poured everything into the kiss.  Its like the kiss let me know how loved I was.  I was staring dumbfounded at him and couldn't form a thought.

A massive wave crashed over us and I woke up. 

I have ZERO desire to kiss my friend.  Honestly I think if he tried to kiss me I'd either burst into a fit of giggles or gag.  We aren't like that.  We never have been and its' never going to happen!!!!

So why...?  Why did my brain go "tonight you aren't going to kiss hubby or your celebrity crush.  Tonight we kiss someone we see as a brother!!!! *muahahahaha*"  I mean seriously...WTAF!

So the doll did it

Okay so back in the day we didn't have alot of moula. Like we were okay-ish but I got hand me downs.  

One hand me down I received was a lifesize doll. 

Who the f**k thought that was fun?  Not like a My Buddy or Kid Sister.  This thing was from the 1950's (?)

She was about 3.5' tall, had matted/knotted horsehair, and her eyes were a haunting crystal blue that closed if you laid her down.  But she was old and one was always half closed.  I HATED HER.  

But my mom was so happy my g-ma kept her that I kept my little mouth shut and didn't complain when we brought her home. 

The idea was that since she was my size I could play dress up with her, etc.  But I was TERRIFIED of her.  I would hide her in my closet and behind my door so I couldn't see her. I never played with her no matter how much I was encouraged to. She ended up being used as a "mannequin" to make my clothes and dance costumes hahaha. 

I haven't thought about this f**king doll in 20+ years, until last night.  When I had a dream.  

In the dream I was in my childhood home but it looked different.  Like I felt like I was at home but it didn't look like my home.  It was bigger but still VERY 80's.  Brown carpet, wood panel walls, yellow-ish lighting, window AC units, and smelled of stale cig smoke. 

I was young-ish in the dream and was scared to death of being alone in the house.  The air felt heavy and weird $hit would happen, like the lights going out and weird noises. My mom kept telling me I was being silly and there was nothing to be scared of until one day I went into my room (which was like twice the size of my actual room) and that f**king lifesize doll was sitting on the floor staring straight ahead.  I yelled for mom and she was like "that's just Sally your new friend".  

I always put her in the closet but when I would come back she was sitting on the floor staring straight at the door.  I swore she was watching me.  One day I was sitting on the floor under the fan playing with legos when the hair on my neck stood up.  I just knew I wasn't alone.  When I looked over my shoulder Sally's head was turned towards me. 

I screamed bloody murder.  When my mom came in she was normal and I was scolded for making her worry.  I was barely sleeping because I was so terrified. I would run in the room, grab a toy and run out.  Weird stuff was still happening and I was getting blamed for it.  

I was punished in my room for being a sassy butthead.  I was griping to myself while sitting on the floor coloring when I got that feeling again.  My crayons flew across the room, my book flew the other way, my stuffed animals were floating and spinning in the air.  I turned and yelled at Sally that I hated her! 

Suddenly I was floating, I was trying to scream for my mom but I could barely make a squeak.  I tried harder and harder but hardly any noise was coming out.  I was flung into the wall which made enough noise for mom to come running in the room.  She saw the chaos and was stunned for a second.  She came to me to help me up and I was still trying to talk but couldn't.  She was like "WHAT???"  

I was sobbing trying to say its Sally!  But it was barely a whisper. I looked and pointed at the doll and watched in horror as her head slowly turn to look at us and I turned my mom's head and tried to scream "I told you that doll was evil!!!!!"

She started shaking me as I was trying to get noise to come out.  I woke up to hubs shaking me saying "hey, hey are you ok?!?!?" 

I had another one of those f**king dreams that was so intense my sleeping form was "screaming" well more like whining so loud it woke up everyone else in the house. 

Maybe I should lay off the Horror Movies

 NEVER!!!!!!!

I love spook spook movies anytime.  But once 10/1 hits I watch all the spook spook ALL.DAY.LONG. 

But I don't do Clowns...nope, NOT HAPPENING and I don't do Exorcism movies.  I don't know what it is about those but they always freak me the F**K out.  

Well I had on AMC or SYFY the other day and wasn't really paying attention when The Conjuring 2 came on.  I've never seen it and honestly wasn't sure what it was about just that it was an Ed and Lorraine movie.  

Well about an hour in and a creepy AF kid later I realize why I've never seen it.  I watched until the end (hoping for closure) but the f**king Nun thing comes out and I know its in other movies and well it was super spook spook. 

Now I know alot of Ed and Lorraine stuff was revealed as sensationalized or downright fake.  Alot wasn't but I've heard that the Enfield House (which this was based on) is possibly now thought to have been grossly exaggerated or possibly faked by the "kids".  

Regardless this stupid f**king movie worked its way into my f**king dreams.  Look I legit watch horror ALOT and rarely do I dream about it.  Usually it's the zombies on speed that I dream about but nothing else.  

Anyways, I remember almost NONE of my dream until the end.  I was a "spectator" for most of it.  Almost like watching a movie.  That I knew.  But it was the end...the climax.  There were 2 young girls.  One was the haunted one.  She was talking to something and her sis was scared.  Suddenly, I was there holding their hands.  The haunted one starts levitating and the other is screaming.  My bright Idea is to scream for their mom so she can help.  But I can't scream.  I am screaming "MOM!!!!" and my throat is hurting but barely a squeak is coming out.  

I scream with all my might and wake up to hubs shaking me asking whose whining, thinking it was a dog.  It was me.  My dream was so intense my body was trying to actually scream...well squeak.  Well after that I was legit awake until the sun came up and tried to snuggle my hubs because I had the heebie jeebies.

Lesson...stick to the classics and leave out the ones I KNOW give me the heebs. Maybe I'll watch some cheesy stupidness today.    

It's a 10 and a half...

It begins in a fight for our lives!  We are running, so much running through a Sci-Fi style city/space port.  I mean full speed sprinting for me...I gots the tiny legs.  I can hear people yelling all around me but I honestly don't know who I am with. 

I know I am with a group but we are fleeing from some angry jerks so they are pushing/pulling me along, just short of picking me up and running with me because I'm just not as fast.  My vision is starting to tunnel, my chest is burning, and I don't think I can go anymore.  Finally we come around the bend and fling ourselves through an open door.  Its a ship and we are immediately preparing for take-off.  As the door slams we can hear the angry screams and banging from our pursuers. 

I collapse on the cool grated floor out of breath.  As my vision begins to clear I can finally take in my surroundings.  It's a bright, almost sterile room.  Everything is basically silver toned.  Its not familiar but it still feels safe, almost like home.  All I can think about is I want a nap and a shower and start to close my eyes.  Suddenly a head of brown hair pops into view and asks in the most chipper voice, why I am laying on the floor.

The hair frames a shadowed familiar face but I can't quite place him.  He helps me up and says something about humans sleeping in the strangest places which makes me stop and try to remember something.  I take in the rest of my shipmates, 7 total.  They all feel like friends but I can't make out their faces.

The one that helped me up says something about needing to go home now because that's where the device is hidden.   

We are running again, this time at sunset through a ravaged town.  The ground is red dirt, the buildings are tattered from a war we seemed to have landed in the middle of.  My legs are burning but my new friend is basically dragging me behind him.  We've lost our friends, they've all been captured and we are trying our best not to be captured also.  We can see the open door, we are so close to escaping when pain blossoms in my back and I fall to my knees on the ground.  

I've been shot, I'm yelling for him to leave me but he wont.  He tries to pick me up but I am in so much pain I can't help and keep falling.  The world goes black.  I wake up on a hay mattress to someone caressing my face and softly saying they are sorry.  I open my eyes and it's night time so not much light, I can't focus but I know its my friend talking to me.  I think he's crying.  I tried to say something but I passed back out.  

The next time I wake up it's morning.  I'm laying on my side and my friend is lying next to me holding my hands.  When he realizes I am awake he gives me the biggest hug ever and keeps saying "I'm sorry".  I asked why he keeps apologizing and he says because it's his fault I am hurt, which I vehemently protest. 

 

He tells me I've been asleep for 4 days and he thought I was going to die.  He knows our friends are also being kept here and all seem to be a little beat up but okay otherwise.  We talked about...something and it ended with me falling asleep, a very gentle kiss on the forehead and a sigh.  

Sometime passed and we came up with a plan to escape and free our friends.  The device was set to go off in a few days so we needed to work quick so we could survive and save home(?). When I was feeling better and we were putting our plan into action I looked up at my friend and my brain said "that's the Doctor".  Now he didn't look like the Doctor.  I mean he kinda looked a little like 10 but like not.  Like 100% not David.  

We somehow convince some soldiers to help us and free our friends.  Things are going sideways, and we are running again.   We all get into two topless humvees.  That's when I realize 2 of our friends are a f**king near duplicate of my friend (seriously subconscious?!?!) and a pretty blonde (come on now!).

Now duplicate and blondie are arguing and then yelling at my friend and it's weird.  It's basically f**king 10 and 10 two but like they aren't 10.  I can't explain it.  But they don't look like him.  I know what he looks like and they were like "wish" versions of 10 (haha).  Like attractive but something was off.  And I had ZERO romantic anything, like we were literally besties.  

Anyways, we are speeding away from the prison when a rocket goes off and is headed towards the prison we just escaped.  Here is where it goes full nerd, please don't judge me too harshly.  

I scream "No they are going to blow up (wait for it) MY T.A.R.D.I.S!"  And my friend looks at me and smiles and says "Yours, huh?!"  But she's safe...I don't know how I know but I know. 

The two humvees get separated by a high road (very Indiana Jones).  My friend is trying to help the others in the other vehicle and is handing his duplicate a box and says remember (name) said we'd know when we'd need it.  Blondie asks who (name) is.  And a f**king fight breaks out because she is jealous of an old "friend".  

And Oh My God, why is my brain locking me in this insanity!

Something happens and the humvee loses control.  I can feel the floor going out from under me.  My friend grabs me and wraps himself around me as we crash. I can feel the impact and our bodies flying forward and then nothing.  

I woke up in a literal cold sweat and racing heart.  

Here's what is weird to me.  I haven't watched Doctor Who since Jodie regenerated back into David like in October 2022.  It's weird because I usually rewatch some fav episodes or binge a little but I literally haven't watched it in almost a year!!!!! I haven't seen Journey's End in probably 2 years or more.  So why did my brain have a fever dream about 10 and 10 two out of the f**king blue?!?!?!