Paranoia is a mental illness...right?

Well its usually a symptom of a worse mental illness but.... 

I understand psychology.  I understand mental illness.  I understand things aren't easy.  I am very understanding and patient.  But its hard for me to wrap my brain around EXTREME paranoia. 

At some point in our lives we all get a little paranoid.  In a person without illness its usually warranted.  Meaning something happened that made you, a logical person, think "Hmmmm, that's odd". 

WE HAVE ALL HAD THIS. And many times our suspicions are correct.  not always, sometimes we just look cookoo but whatever. 

What drives me a bit nuts is unwarranted extreme constant paranoia.  I try.  I really do.  But the triggers are so sensitive I don't know what to do.

Example, after two calls and three texts unanswered, concern turns into angry paranoia.  "I know they aren't answering me because they are mad because of _____". 

Something ridiculous that makes no sense but to them its the obvious reason they aren't responding.

I try to be the anchor.  I try to "talk them down" with logic.  Not being an @$$hole just offering an alternative explanation.  I am ALWAYS told I am wrong and I just don't understand.  And 99% of the time, I am right.

This is a minor example.  Things have gotten REALLY hairy in recent years, so I did some research.

"Symptoms of paranoia and delusional disorders include intense and irrational mistrust or suspicion, which can bring on sense of fear, anger, and betrayal. Some identifiable beliefs and behaviors of individuals with symptoms of paranoia include mistrust, hypervigilence, difficulty with forgiveness, defensive attitude in response to imagined criticism, preoccupation with hidden motives, fear of being deceived or taken advantage of, inability to relax, or are argumentative."

"It can be difficult to treat a person with paranoia since symptoms result in increased irritability, emotionally guardedness, and possible hostility. "

I can see that but I really really really think something is wrong but I don't know what to do.  Its gotten worse with age.  I'm not trying to make light of this...I'm really just at a loss. 

I mean they hold grudges (like 30+ year grudges).  Everyone is ALWAYS out to get them.  Nothing wrong in their life is their fault, its always someone else's fault.  Anyone that disagrees is "working against them" in order to "prove they are incapable of *pick something*"

I'll figure something out... I am just so tired....

I dressed up as The Doctor and now my soul belongs to Satan

Look I'm not really one to be like "your beliefs are stupid" but sometimes I see (or am told/TAGGED IN) $hit and just want to throat punch people.

LINK

Right...okay.  What?!?!!?!? Also, stop tagging me in this stuff!!!!!

If you don't want to celebrate Halloween, that's fine.  But stop with the stupid.  Halloween is not a satanic holiday.  If the church of Satan uses it as a holiday they "stole" it from earlier religions/traditions ...just like CHRISTIANS "stole" the winter solstice...also known as Christmas...from earlier Pagan religions. 

Again, if this is your belief I guess that's fine but stop telling me that because I celebrate my FAVORITE holiday I am not Christian and stop telling me my littles are being opened to demons because little Suzy dressed up as f**king Cinderella!

"We think because we are not performing any demonic rituals or human sacrifices that we are on safe ground, but did you know that as soon as you dress up, whether you color yourself or put on a costume, the enemy owns you? Because by doing so, you have turned over your legal rights, and you have dedicated yourself and your kids to celebrating the devil's holiday. "

What?!?! Are you saying I signed some divine LEGAL contract at some point and celebrating Halloween negates it?!?!? I don't think that's how this works....

Here's my take on it.  This person is a troll.  Like the ultimate troll.  How can I make already hyper paranoid Christians bat$hit...I know lets tell them if they put kids in Costume on one specific f**king day of the year, they're turning them into devil worshipers *pahahahahaha*.

Riiiiiight...*rolling eyes*.

"As devil worshippers, Halloween was very special to us, and we looked forward to celebrating it because we knew the implications and the dark power behind the night."

This is f**king dumb.  There is no special freaking demon power on Halloween.  It is an end of harvest festival that can be traced back to Celtic and Gaelic folk traditions. 

Here is where I think all the crazy BS comes in.  "it was seen as a liminal time, when the boundary between this world and the Otherworld thinned.  The souls of the dead were also said to revisit their homes seeking hospitality."

So a combination of OLD traditions.  Traditions that existed BEFORE CHRISTIANITY combined with new traditions created the holiday we now call Halloween.  

Tell me again how I am worshiping Satan if I am a f**king minion on Halloween and hand out candy to cute little kids who are having fun? 

But wait there's more! "The only harvest we celebrate is the harvest of souls.  For many who celebrate Halloween, that celebration carries over to Nov. 1, which is also known to some as the Day of the Dead, or All Saints' Day, but there is nothing holy about it—it is demonic."

Really...you are telling me ALL SAINTS' DAY...the day we (well some of us) visit the graves of our dead relatives and friends to leave flowers is...demonic...?  "We have a picture in our minds that it seems holy, but there is nothing innocent about it. " Uh huh.... 

No!!!!!  It is a day of f**king remembrance.  We REMEMBER those who have gone to heaven...recognized Saints and those not recognized.  We aren't performing some ritual to bring our friend back as a f**king zombie.   

Ya know what, its fine don't celebrate Halloween or All Saints' Day for that matter...more candy for me and less people when I leave flowers.  

This is how crazy happens!  Seriously, the devil is not hiding in a Holiday.  If you believe in Lucifer then you should also believe that he is always there tempting you.  He doesn't pop out on f**king Halloween and say "Ahhhahahahaha, you dressed your child as a sock monkey, his soul is now mine".  

Sorry, this stuff just makes me irrationally angry...

Paranoia paranoia everybody's coming to get me.......................

Ahhhhhhahahaaha!  Also, the plush Dalek sold it for me.  Look I get it, the government is watching (talk about fiction becoming reality).  But think about this...they've been doing it for years, we are now only more aware of it because of Wikileaks and Snowden and stuff like that.  Guess the guys with the foil hats had a point...

So while I do not fancy being spied on in my own home how do we prevent it...?  Are you going to get rid of all electronics with mics and webcams?  I mean I kinda can but I won't.  I did unplug Alexa but that is because I have a playful spirit talking to her and freaking me the F**K out.

No really she came on the other day when I was sitting on the couch...alone...with no TV or music on while reading a book.  She said something like, "I remember it like it was yesterday.  There were clouds in the sky and I could hear the surf from the ocean...."  ALEXA STOP!  WTF is happening???  Was she doing an audio book??? So yea she got unplugged...

I don't have any smart TVs, I unplugged Alexa, our cameras are outside, I keep a bandaid over my webcam (not because of the government...because my ex is an IT genius and he all but told me he could watch me through my computer without me knowing - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!), and our phones are usually in the other room...not because of paranoia but because we are trying to pay attention to each other when we are home.

Now if someone really wants to listen/watch us having wild monkey sex on the couch because we can, more power to you...just be sure to Photoshop my flaws and blur out my face before you show it to anyone else.

K thanks bye