If I am right, and I usually am, it is in fact
2015. A time where we are not governed by the ridiculous standards of our grandparents
(great grandparents) time. Women are not just seen as an accessory for a man...they are their own people...with their own careers...with their own mind. It hurts my brain every time I hear someone say something that sounds like it came out of the early 1900's. I will sum it up...er, well list it out, below. And note that I know this does not define everyone...I am just saying I have been shocked to hear such things in today's society.
1.) "Oh my God! Did you hear she's pregnant??? She's not even married! Such a shame."
Um...first what does being married have to do with having a baby??????????? Last I checked it takes two to tango...why are we focusing on the woman here? Who cares if there is or isn't a husband in the picture.
$hit happens people! We are a free loving society...not many people wait till marriage to have
$ex so quit being so judgmental. It isn't a shame. What is a shame is it was probably completely unplanned which means a lot of things are going to change for her
(and him). They need our support not our sideways stares and hushed whispers.
2.) "She got knocked up on purpose!"
Yes there are women who have done this but come on. Accidents do happen ya know and again there was a guy there who had to contribute. You think your sig other is trying to get
PG on purpose wrap that
$hit up son or don't sleep with her, you do have a say ya know.
3.) "Well now they have to get married, for the baby."
Really...that is your take away here??? Sure lets force marriage on people who had a whoops. Lets create a potential hostile situation where two people who maybe barely know each other or weren't meant to be married are coerced into it because their sexual exploits created a new life. This just creates a higher divorce rate and a bad situation for the little one. A baby does not equal
must get married. If at some point it happens, great, but don't force it because you are having a baby.
4.) "Make an honest woman out of her."
I am going to nut punch you! I am not even addressing this one further.
5.) "You ruined my life!"
Wow! While I understand having a child is a big deal...saying it ruined a life is going a bit far. And again...you took part in this. To make a baby you had to insert
tab A into
slot B. It's not like she siphoned off your little swimmers without your permission or he put them in you without permission
(forced sexual content excluded). If you aren't ready to support another life, maybe you should have thought about that before you did the horizontal mambo.
6.) "I pulled out, she must have cheated on me!"
WTF are you smoking?!? Sex ed 101...pulling out doesn't work. There is still a chance some can get through...this isn't her fault...man up! Take some responsibility.
7.) "You can't keep it!" or "You have to keep it!"
They can do what they want... I am not touching the pro life/pro choice debate with a 10 foot pole but I am saying if she does have the baby, adoption is a solution...if dad wants him/her okay but you can't tell her she has to keep it... just like you can't tell her she can't keep it. He/she is her baby too...
8.) "I can't believe he is dating her...she has a child!"
While I understand when you are in your early twenties this can be a slight hindrance it shouldn't dictate whether or not you like a person. So what if his sig other has child already, I can almost guarantee he isn't a virgin so he very easily could have fathered a child also, even though he hasn't
(that we know of). Do not judge her because she has a child, just don't...we should be a forward thinking society..
STOP!
a.) What kills me further is when said person decides he wants to marry this
"harlot" and
*gasp*
adopts her child. Some people freak out...why?!? I think that is very
sweet..admirable...treating someone else's child as your own.
b.) Also, for some reason when the situation is reversed the guy is seen as almost a hero.
"He
has a child. He is clearly a good man if he is so involved in his child's life." There isn't the
same stereotype for him
(sometimes there is but not usually).
Single dad = hero, single mom = whore...
what the actual f**k...just no.
Maybe it is just in the
Deep South but I doubt it. Life isn't easy...add a kid to it and it gets even harder but we should
NOT be judging people based on this. There are so many other more important situations we can focus on instead of whether or not a woman happens to have a child out of wedlock.
