Is the plague over yet?

No, no it isn't!  You know how I know?!!?!  Because as careful as I have been, masks, vaccine, no big crowds.... I got it!!!!!!  And it wasn't because of my carelessness.  Nooooooo.

I, being responsible, got tested before Christmas because I had been exposed at work the week before.  I was negative.  But one of my lovely anti-pandemic (as in it is a scare tactic created by the Government and isn't real) family members came to a gathering KNOWING they had been exposed.  They tested +.  

Hubs started feeling bad first, then two days later me.  I was just going to quarantine and take it easy.  But my experience involved a STABBING headache.  Not just sinus pressure, a literal sporadic Ice Pick stabbing feeling behind my ear.  It got so bad I did a tele-doc appointment.  She wouldn't give me any Rxs without getting tested so I did and SHOCKING, it was +.  I ended up with multiple Rxs because well I was pretty sick at this point.  

Honestly the worst part for me was the Sinus Pressure.  It was SOOOOOO bad, I couldn't sleep.  Plus I had fever for 3 days.  I was fried!  Turns out the stabbing pain was probably something called Occipital Neuralgia.   And I can tell you with 100% certainty I would not wish it on my worst enemy.  I thought my brain was coming out of my ear. 

Thankfully the worst of it only lasted 5 days.  I'm still wonky, tired, and not 100% but it could have been 1000 times worse.  People who keep saying "Covid is just like a bad cold" as an excuse to be careless are PISSING ME OFF.  Because yes, that is a decent description but why the f**k would you want to get a really bad cold...KNOWINGLY?!!?!  

And honestly while I've had bad colds/Flus/sinus infections, this was different.  I am mostly recovered but I am still exhausted.  And I don't regret getting vaccinated.  Because I can't imagine how AWFUL it would have been had I not been vaccinated.  I know people not vaccinated and they got it way worse than me, like long lingering symptoms.  I'm not here to judge you if you don't want the vaccine I am just saying my experience.  I just really want to NEVER experience that again.  

Each day is better so hopefully that continues!

Y'all Nasty!

I am so over people who have ZERO manners.  If there is one thing I need you parents (guardians, Awesome Aunties, etc) to teach your crotch goblins is to always cover their mouth/nose when they sneeze/cough!!! That way they become adults who always cover their mouth/nose when they sneeze/cough.

So far parents at this point are doing an awesome job.  All the littles I see as young as 3ish cover, use an elbow, down the shirt.  But alas the parents of the 70's & 80's you have FAILED US!

I have never seen so many 30, 40, and sometimes 50 somethings that just blow snot everywhere without a care of who is around.  WHAT THE F**K IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!?!?

We were in a place with lots and lots of people....kids and adults alike.  And its funk season, I know this.  But 90% the kiddies COVERED THEIR FACES WHEN sneezing or coughing.  Many adults did too but SOOOOO many over 30 year olds...some WAY OVER 30 year olds just shot their funk on everyone near by.

And now I know how the zombie apocalypse starts!

There I was standing in line...minding my own business when suddenly the guy in the line next to me full on sneeze coughed IN MY FACE!  Well the side of my face...STILL! Do you know what a sneeze cough is?  Let me enlighten you...its where you sneeze and cough at the same time spraying anything within 5 feet of you with snot and spit!

Without thinking I yelled ARE YOU Fffffff........I paused thankfully because children where there...and said SERIOUS?!?!!?!??!  He had the right of mind to look ashamed but still.  I told my husband loudly, I think I need to bathe in hand sanitizer....and I did.  In front of him and like 30 other people, I scrubbed down with peppermint scented hand sani...ahhh feel the burn!  The man in front of me asked me to share...and I did.  I think he got hit with some of the spray.  We couldn't go anywhere but wait out the line.  After I was out of line, I went to the bathroom and scrubbed my face and hair. 

Two days later (basic incubation period for a cold/virus) I started to feel a little sniffly.  Day three (the day we flew home) I was miserable and couldn't breath out of my nose.  Day four, my last day of vacay I had to miss an event and literally slept 90% of the day.  Here we are on day five.  I have a sinus funk, am exhausted, and sound like a f**king seal when I cough. 

Conclusion Thanks to some @$$hole I was next to in line the other day, I am pretty sure I have some sort of plague.  Guess I'll be going to the Doctor before my Christmas Party tomorrow...yay....

Why haven't we invented Transporters yet?? Teleporting...? A Vortex Manipulator...? Something that means I can travel without strangers...something that doesn't include me springing for a private jet.

Has anyone ever seen that Jimmy Kimmel skit with Sir Patrick Stewart playing the part of the annoying airline passenger?!?!?!  Because I remember watching it ages ago and I laughed my @$$ off!  Not only because its freaking hilarious but also because how can you NOT love Sir Patrick Stewart?!!??!

With that said, on my flight back home the other day I had all of those annoying characteristics and more in ONE passenger seated behind me.  I should mention it was a later flight...after 7PM and it had been delayed a bit before we boarded.

We were delayed longer because of weather and he b**ched constantly.  He wouldn't shut up about how we'd been "sitting in the plane for 30 minutes and weren't moving", blah blah blah.  Yea well I'd rather be sitting here than trying to take off in a mini hurricane, just saying! 

Then he wanted to talk to everyone around him.  "Hey, you ever been to New Orleans? It's a great place! I've been many many times.  Bourbon is the best. This one time..."  Meanwhile I am just trying to sink as low as I can in my seat and read my book so he'll stop including me in the one sided conversation.   I think he realized this because then he started SHAKING my seat trying to get my attention (what is your f**king problem?!?!). He had also stuck his arm between the seat and wall and kept tapping my shoulder.

We finally took off and he started f**king clapping and cheering and WHISTLING!  OMG STAHP!

The entire 1 1/2 hour flight his knee was in my back.  He was so slouched, his GD knee was WEDGED in my back.  Which isn't kicking but its a close second when it comes to annoying. 

Then...oh then, he opened his dinner.  Yea, I don't care usually when people eat on a plane BUT it was something...Greek or Cajun or Hot Wings or some mixture.  My point is the smell of Garlic and other things was almost nauseating in the tiny space.

He didn't climb over anyone to go pee BUT he did practically run everyone over trying to exit the plane.  I thought it was common knowledge that you wait until the people in front of you exit???  He wasn't a small guy either...he was built like a f**king linebacker. 

Below is the video from Kimmel Live, so fitting

But you see my adventure didn't end there.  The part I left out...that ISN'T in the video is the absolutely DISGUSTING part.  Mid-Flight I kept hearing him clear his throat, like obnoxiously *aheeming* and *back sniffling*...I figured whatever smelly thing he was eating had spice or something.  Then it happened.  He f**king sneezed!  I am not talking about a normal "ahchoo".  I am talking full on DAD sneeze.

He didn't even try to cover his mouth/nose.  It was so forceful that even though there was a f**king seat back behind me my hair blew forward!  And...oh god it gets worse...and I didn't have my sweater on like I usually do and my arm that was near the window was suddenly moist and there were a few droplets on the page I was reading.  I freaked.  Normally I'd not cause a scene and I didn't say anything to him but I did say something along the lines of "*ahhhh* that is disgusting!  Great now I am going to get the plague!".  I didn't scream it...I said it just loud enough to be heard.  He didn't even apologize or offer me a napkin...thankfully the flight attendant was right there and handed me a bunch of napkins and some hand sanitizer (THANK YOU SWEET BABY JESUS) which I rubbed on my arms and face and hands...basically all exposed skin.  This leads me to the present. You see, a few days after my flight, I started to feel funky *crap*.  I don't have the full blown Plague, I have more of a Plague Light.  Which still sucks but not quite as bad.  *fingers crossed* it doesn't decide it wants to be full blown Plague. 

With all this said, it reminded me of something I saw on imgur or tumblr or reddit...I dunno, one of them and I've been laughing so hard my sides hurt...or maybe its a new symptom of the Plague...who knows.

Lesson: "Humans very well may be the Klingons of the Universe"
(I didn't come up with that, Source). 

Maybe I need reading glasses...

So I totally read this as "Got Plague?" 

And immediately thought who on Earth has Plague right now and would oil pulling really work?!?!?  This is revolutionary!!!  Then I realized it says "plaque"...right...like on your teeth...got it. 

Stupid font making me read things wrong. *grumble, grumble*

Yea, that's right, I blamed the font, say somethin'!