So like the X-men...?

Weird dreams are my jam lately.  So after falling down a mountain. My subconscious decided to be just plain weird. 

This is one of those jumpy dreams but what I remember is VIVID.  

Anyways so I was in "college".  But it was NOT college.  It was basically a prison camp for gifted individuals.  And I wasn't college age...I was my current age.  Everyone there was of varying ages and had...talents.  Except me.  I was known as the "weirdo" without a talent.  

You see sometime in 2020 (f**k 2020) there was an event of sorts.  This event affected our DNA and certain individuals ended up with a mutated gene causing varying powers.  But not everyone was affected and the ones affected were the minority so the normies were scared of us hence the "camps".   

The reason I was there even without a "talent", is because I had the mutated gene, I just never exhibited anything.  But fear of my potential sent me there, yay humanity *rolling eyes*.

It jumped around alot but I remember a one point being in a cafeteria eating.  I had friends, really good friends, but I was also made fun of a lot because I was basically nothing special.  It sucked but I dealt with it.  Jumping ahead, I was in my "dorm" after being assaulted by some jerks and was having a serious anxiety attack.   Suddenly I was glowing, a rainbow of hexagons blinking around me like some cracked out aura.  As I calmed down they faded.  WTF?!?

It jumped again and I was in an empty classroom freaking out.  I had just been tortured (again?!?) by these guys all in black trying to draw out a "talent".  Once I was alone my weird hexagon aura showed up rapidly blinking all around me.  Except, I was NOT alone.  My friend, who was a scientist that "studied" us but didn't agree with the "camp" situation happened to be in the room. He scared me and I suddenly "blinked away".  I was invisible.  And I only knew I was because he nervously asked where I went.  

It jumped again weeks...months...(?!?) and I was working on controlling my emotions and my talents.  I made a habit of invisibly wandering around campus and into "secure" areas trying to find out what was happening; my scientist friend kept my secret.  

Jumping AGAIN, someone new was brought to the camp.  He was an anomaly.  Apparently he was filming a new movie when he burst into colorful hexagons scaring the bejesus out of his costar.  When they tried to restrain him he disappeared briefly.  No one, including the scientists nor the actor himself, understood  what caused it to manifest as they couldn't get it to really happen again.    

So I sent him a note to meet me in a dark abandoned auditorium (that's not creepy).  I waited invisible in a  seat.  He seemed nervous but in control.  He sat down near me.  I gently caressed  his forearm causing very faint "blinking" but he was unaware of me still and confused why he was "blinking".  I leaned in very close and whispered, I know how to control it.  He burst into a full spectrum of colors and was breathing heavily trying to figure out where I was.  Before he could speak I told him try not to react to me...pretend I wasn't there.  As the blinking calmed a bit, I climbed over him not touching but straddling, hovering just above his lap.  It was like a weird seduction but that wasn't my plan, I could give two $hits about seducing him.  I was no longer alone!  Just as he thought I had left and was relaxing I "ground" down (...grind... you get the idea) and spoke into his ear. "The key is extreme emotion".  It scared the absolute crap out of him & maybe kinda turned him on a bit... He disappeared briefly but in that brief moment he could see me and I could see him...sort of.  WHAT IS HAPPENING?!?!? It was just a vague human shape and a color...I was clearly female, pinkish purple and he was clearly male and a royal blue.  He reappeared and as I was contemplating having more fun with him or bolting away, I was punched in the eye.

Wait what?!?!  Who punched me?!?!  I was now awake in a pitch black strange room (Ah, still on vacay) and was seeing "colors" behind my  right eyelid BECAUSE my husband had just backhanded me in his sleep.  Dammit!  That dream was just getting really good! 

The hit wasn't hard, I was fine, and he felt awful. 

Fin

Am I part spider? Why do I attract spiders?!? Do I speak spider?!? Like Parseltongue but for arachnids......

For real though, I seriously seem to attract arachnids.  They don't harm me...just scare the bejesus out of me on a fairly regular basis.  As I've stated in the past I have no fear of our little arachnid friends.  I rather like them since they eat other critters.  But that still doesn't mean I like them visible in my vicinity...especially when I am driving! 

Let me set the scene.  It was a gorgeous fall day.  Perfect to ride with the windows down.  I went run some errands.  Now mind you, since not long ago I walked out to see I had webbing all over my car, I usually check for stowaways.  I saw none.  So I went about my afternoon enjoying the wind blowing through my open windows with the radio up loud, playing "Can't stop the feeling" (this is important). 

I was going about 40MPH down a two lane country road possibly singing off key when I noticed something out the corner of my eye.  It looked like some foliage stuck in my side mirror coming loose.  That is about when I realized the foliage looked like a crab, WTF?!?  And then it came loose...WTAF?!?!

Me: "can't stop the....what the mother f**king, holy $hitballs!  OMG is that a f**king crustacean?!?!"  
Spider: *looks at me* 'sup?
Me: *screaming like a banshee* 

I mean it looked at me as best a multi-eyed arachnid can look at you.  I'm sure you are thinking it came loose and was thrown into my car because of the wind.  Oh no no no, apparently Mr. Spider just wanted to feel the breeze through his leg hairs.  That mother f**ker was parasailing from my freaking mirror.  You don't understand...there was no shoulder...there was no parking lot to turn into...just a ditch on either side, some trees and a random driveway here and there. As in, there was no stopping...

very bad artist rendering

 Yes yes I know, it looks like an engorged tick but you get the gist of my freak out...right?!?!?!?

So I get the window up and lose track of it.  I guess it flew off...or is still hiding in my mirror....who knows. 

Anyway, a few days later I am using the potty and "surprise"... a rather large wolf spider is dangling inches from my face. 

I am in a very vulnerable position here...NOT FUNNY!

In conclusion I attract spiders...am I spider woman?  Do I have a suppressed super power!?!?!   Just call me the Spider Whisperer.  It's like Ant-man but I don't have a suit.