I can't believe...What year is it?!

So way back in the recesses of 2014, I posted about makeup BS at work.  I work for a new company now...I work FROM HOME...not to mention its 2022 and this came up...AGAIN!

On a "zoom" call TWO YEARS post global pandemic...where people have been working from home and zooming has become more normalized.  I had someone make a comment on my "makeupless" face.  

It was a 7AM call that I wasn't even supposed to be on.  I don't generally log in until 8AM so there was no reason for me to be "made up" at that time.  But since I was "summoned" I logged in to do whatever.  About 10 people didn't have cameras on so I didn't feel bad.  

Well because some 60 year old (not being an @$$hole, they really are 60) decided we all had to have cameras on, so I did.  Then he...YES HE...proceeded to call me out on a call with 25+ people about having no makeup on.  

I was so flabbergasted I didn't even know what to say at first.  One, I wasn't even supposed to be logged on! Two, Rude! Three, 100% something I do not need to wear.  So I said as professionally as possible, f**k off, and the meeting continued.  Then, he proceeds to make $hit comments the rest of the meeting.  

Rather than publically be a jerk, because I know that's what he wanted, I just ignored him and rolled my eyes.  Mind you it wasn't all on me.  He was making comments about others.  Look we weren't frumpy or homeless looking.  I had on a nice shirt, hair fixed, and lipgloss.  Just not a full face of makeup. 

So after some consideration, it was decided to make a formal complaint to HR. Basically stating when he has to wear makeup everyday, I'll consider it.  He was removed from the meetings I was on and no one told me I have to wear makeup.  I still think more should have happened but whatever. 

Rant over. But seriously mind your own business.  I have sensitive skin and I don't like makeup everyday.  Also, NOT IN THE HANDBOOK and NOT REQUIRED you sexist @$$hat. 

What year is it?!?

 

I don't know what is in the water but holy crap I have never experienced so much chauvinism in ONE week. 

I am a professional.  I have been in various business roles for many many years.  I am intelligent.  I....am a threat...what?!?  Why is it.  WHY IS IT that if me, a female, shares an idea its $hit on but when a male shares the same or similar, its praised?!?!?  I literally said the same thing.  

Also, the fragility of these older men I work with is eye opening.  I am not being critical just trying to express my ideas.  Why can't I express my ideas without being put down?  Why do older men think they can just talk over me when they don't like what I have to say!?!?  To the point where I was like "can I finish answering your question before you start speaking again...please?"  It was so bad I had people messaging me after the call about how bad it was.  Its great and all that they noticed but why was everyone quiet?!?!  Almost no one came to my defense.  You know why?  Because half of them were also female and they are scared to LOSE THEIR JOB for speaking up.  Do you know how f**ked up that is?!?!  The other men on the call...I will give it to a couple.  They did try to back me up a little but when he went after them they shut up quick.  What sucks is my idea isn't bad.  It would be a win win for everyone if we can get it implemented.  The problem is it gets rid of a bunch of manual processes HE created.  Instead of being open minded he pitched a fit to make sure HIS WAY stayed in place, even if its antiquated.  

Also, come to find out a woman who quit two weeks ago found out she was paid $20,000 LESS than her male counterpart.  Same years of experience, same education, same track record for the most part.  But he was paid more and treated her like his own personal secretary even though they had the same job.  Then he had the nerve...THE NERVE to ask her for a reference because he thinks his time is limited.  Why you ask...well because after she left they realized she was doing everything and he is basically a sentient paperweight.  

Again,....

Then I was at an event with some friends and acquaintances.  Not too many people and not inside (COVID!!!).  Anyways, one of the ladies I don't know as well was leaving, kinda early.  When someone asked her why she was bugging out so soon she said she had to get home.  Okay I know for a fact all of her kids have already left for college so no kiddies but okay.  She said she needed to get home to cook dinner.  Okay......  I mean whatever we all have stuff we do but you never go out with everyone....

She reluctantly said well, her husband requires her to be home every night no later than 6:30 so she can cook him dinner.  If she goes out or works later, she still needs to be home to cook because "he gives her off on the weekends".  WHAT!!??!!?  She is a working woman.  Why does she have to leave an event to cook him dinner?!?!  He works from home.  I...WHAT IS HAPPENING?!!?  One of the guys jokingly said what happens if you don't cook M-F?  She said, it's not worth the fight, plus she does have off those two days.  

He is a grown @$$ man.  He can't cook dinner ONE week night so his wife can have a night out....?

"Listen, little girl"

It is never okay to say this, it is condescending and disrespectful.

I don't care who you are, what your position is, what your gender is, or where you work; if you call me "little girl" I am going to be angry.  I am of a smaller stature and look young but you do NOT know me, if I made you feel stupid that is NOT my problem.  I am beyond professional, if you feel dumb its because you have issues not me.

Story time 1:

Helping a client.  They are new and request something that is taboo but make it look like our stuff doesn't work right.  It is something that is NEVER recommended.  I respond back using it as a teaching opportunity.  I was not condescending, I was not trying to make them look bad.  They copied FIFTEEN people trying to make ME look bad, I  responded to everyone (because I know half of them) and I have nothing to hide.  I said my piece and gave my solution.

I got a response back just to me, "Listen, little girl.  You will not embarrass me in front of my bosses and employees.  You will treat me with respect.  You will not use me as an example."

Someone has a superiority complex...

I responded and cc'd the people he excluded.  "Hello ____, I am sorry you feel this way.  I was not targeting you.  I was not trying to embarrass you.  I was just informing you of how things are set up since you are newer to the position.  I treat all of my contacts with utmost respect, I only ask that they do the same for me.  Please do not call me 'Little Girl'.  I am a business professional with 17 years of experience in this field and am here to help you.  I meant no disrespect, my apologies." 

I will not let people get away with this $hit anymore.  You want to act like I am beneath you, then be an adult and copy everyone.  If you aren't man enough to have your bosses and FEMALE employees know how insecure you are, don't send it in writing.

Story time 2:

Buying a vehicle.  This one happened a little while ago.  Went with the sig other to get some info on a larger vehicle for him.  While looking at our trade in, the finance guy and sales guy insulted us ten times over because we refused to just accept their price.  Saying we will NEVER be able to afford said vehicle etc etc etc.  They also offered us way too little for the trade in, it was BS and they knew it.  We look young and they were clearly trying to take advantage/bully us into a sale.  The kicker, they wouldn't talk to me.  I would talk and they would only look and speak to my husband like I wasn't even there. The hubs would say something and look to me to agree/disagree/add input and they would ignore me,  f**k you very much! They wouldn't work with us but also wouldn't give us back our keys.  I finally stood up and said "Give me my car keys, now!"  The finance guy looked right at me and said "Sit down little girl, we are speaking to your husband".

My husband stood up and defended me.

I finally said "really.  that's nice.  the vehicle we are trading in, is in both our names.  the new vehicle will be in both our names.  We are married, if you want to make a deal, you want to talk to BOTH of us.  But I am done talking.  Give me my f**king keys or I am calling the police!".  I don't normally swear like that...I do it in jest but not in anger when I am trying to be the bigger person. 

We got our keys but no apologies.  We literally walked out with the sales guy laughing and talking loudly to other sales people saying something about people being embarrassed because they WEREN'T approved...

I retold my experience on BBB, Facebook, Twitter, and via a survey from their corporate office asking about our experience & when we might come back to complete the sale.  Again, not letting these tw@t waffles get away with this $hit anymore.  I saw I wasn't the 1st or even 20th person to complain.  Its not surprising the dealership bankrupted about 6 months later.  That is NOT how you do business.

"Vaginas in space?!? No Thanks!"

Seriously?!?!  Just one of the NUMEROUS idiotic comments I saw on Sunday.  Come on people, really?!?!

If you are unaware or not a fan, they announced who the next Doctor will be.  And He is regenerating into a She.  People are losing their minds.

Link

Is it different, yes.  Is it bad...I don't think so.  I know, I know he's been a he FOREVER!  And I love him as a He.  But other Timelords changed gender why not him.  Hell, his best frenemy became a girl (Missy) so clearly its not out of the realm of possibilities.  PLUS they've been hinting at this for a while, easing us into it. We see The Master as Missy, we see a general (I  think, I can't remember) change from male to female. They've been telling us its happening.

I was shocked at first too but I love the show and I love the character so lets give her a chance.  I personally think it could be great.  Shake things up a bit.  Change isn't always bad.  I'm not saying you can't be upset, everyone can feel how they want to.  I am just saying if you are a fan, give her a chance.  If she sucks, congrats you were right.  If she's awesome, you get to see the 1st female Doctor running through time and space being amazing.

And for those complaining that "all I'll be able to see is the mom from Broadchurch", you mean to tell me you didn't think the same thing about Capaldi (Malcolm Tucker) or when Tennant became Kilgrave (all I see is Ten being a tw@t).  Yes, its hard to picture them in different roles once you associate a specific one with them but remember they are actors, some pretty amazing actors.  Give them a chance to show you how talented they are.

What's done is done, let's hope for the best.