I'm think I've mentioned before I am an empath. I didn't know what it was until I was older. I just thought I was "emotional" but after talking to an old friend of mine she pegged it.
I feel people's....feelings. I know a lot of people think that is rubbish but its real. I get so overwhelmed by other people's emotions sometimes. Its very obvious its not my reaction but I just...feel it. With some its stronger than others. I don't know if they "project" more or I tune more into them or some combination of things.
For a few months now I've had intense random emotions. That makes me sound like looney but I don't mean like something is mentally wrong with me. It's really hard to explain.
I was on my way home from a conference (driving). I was listening to music and just having my own personal concert on my drive home. It was a whirlwind couple days with my friend I've mentioned before and a new friend and a ton of other business related persons I don't see often but as always a lot of fun so I was decompressing.
I was fine all day (also very distracted all day). But from the moment I left the hotel around 4PM Central I had a knot in my chest that would come and go. I kept saying maybe it was too much caffeine and lack of sleep. But it felt different. Like you know that intense feeling like when you have strong feelings for someone and you haven't seen them in a while or you see them again after a while. Either way it's just so strong it almost hurts.
So I started shuffling songs around and singing more. I tried a podcast but I couldn't focus on it...my mind was wandering too much. It would come in waves. Just intense, longing maybe and happiness and a little sad but happy sad.
Anyways, around 8PM Central...I was about maybe 10 min from my house when "Say you won't let go" by: James Arthur shuffled on my Pandora. Now I have heard this song I'm sure 100+ times since it released. I can sing almost every word. It has NEVER affected me in any way except evoking my amazing karaoke skills!
But that feeling came back ten fold. A swelling knot was building in my upper chest and I started crying. Not sobbing or sad, but tears were freely flowing down my face. It wasn't a bad feeling at all. I felt all warm and happy inside but the tears kept coming.
It didn't feel like a me emotion. It was the absolute strangest feeling. And the only other times something that intense has happened, there was another person near me. But I was alone in my car and there weren't any other vehicles around me.
So I googled it....and yes I know you can't believe everything on the interwebs buuuuut.
"An empath can potentially feel the emotions of someone who isn't physically near them, especially if they have a strong emotional connection with that person, which is sometimes referred to as "simulpathity" in psychological terms; however, this is not a scientifically proven phenomenon and the intensity of such feelings may vary greatly between individuals."
Ummm come again?!?! So in theory...someone I am deeply connected to, projected such a strong emotion, I felt it even though they weren't there???? But who and why...? Was it all f**king day and I just didn't realize what was happening because I was talking to so many people?!??!!
I checked with family and friends I am close to and obviously hubs but no one seemed off so I have no idea WTAF is going on. But I am starting to think I have a very strong connection to someone "new-ish"...I say that because its been happening since July, today was just insanely intense. I think I have an idea of who it might be but I am not 100% they know and I don't want to freak them out.
