I feel like mine may have started with, "Hey, hold my beer".

So I saw this on Imgur or Tumblr or Pinterest or...I don't recall which one, I just saved it.  Anyways, I saw it and just keep laughing.

Yes I saw the comments above and yes they are funny...DUCK!

First let me say, I noticed in the comments on the site I was on that some people don't know what a Birth Mark is.  A birth mark is something you are BORN with.  Meaning, it doesn't pop up later in life...those are usually called Moles, Sunspots, Age spots, or Scars.  Birth Mark = a MARK on your baby body that was there when you popped out your momma or shows up shortly after. 

Why is this funny...weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell...I may or may not have a Birth Mark on my lower butt cheek/upper leg.  Meaning, if this is true then I died from a wound in the @$$.  Maybe I was shot...maybe stabbed...or MAYBE I said "hold my beer" and some "here's your sign" type injury occurred.  Add that to I was probably just as clumsy and well....

I don't know if you've ever jumped into a murky river or lake but those f**kers usually have sticks/logs/etc and they HURT!  Maybe that is why I have a slight "fear" of murky water.  My dumb@$$ former self jumped @$$ first into a river and was impaled.  And then eaten by a gator (heheheheHA).

I also happen to have a perfect dark circle on the back of my shoulder (born with it).  While that doesn't seem life threatening, I guess if it happened a long time ago dying of infection was probably an issue.  Not as "fun" as the other one.  Weeeellll maybe if we think of it as a heroic act saving someone.  Who am I kidding I probably fell while running with scissors...how it impaled me from the back is...I am just THAT talented.  I will say though, that one gets A LOT of attention.  For some reason when people see it they have this uncontrollable urge to poke it..."Um 'scuse you". 

No really, I've had complete strangers touch it.  WTF?!?  Its not gnarly or anything, just a flat mark.  So back in the day, people called it my "button"...don't push my BUTTON(s)! 

People do NOT poke the other one, well my husband does, but he is allowed.  If a stranger "poked" that one, we would have a problem.  I usually use it as a gauge.  If I bend over and you can see my mark...shorts are too short...or I just shouldn't bend over...

Conclusion:  I either died very heroically or I spazzed out or I was shot in the @$$...the possibilities are endless.