They're like Vampires, you can't INVITE them in

When opportunities present themselves, you should seize them, right?

So imagine my surprise when I was gifted a brand new state of the art kitchen appliance!!!  Like purchased from the store would have been $300+.  Only been used a few months bc they moved in with their partner and didn't need two.  Anyways, we seized the opportunity.  

We didn't set it up right away because I was out of town and we were super busy so it was sitting in my office.  

Anyways, about 1 day after we got it hubs saw a critter on the counter.  It looks like a tiny bug who shall not be named but he wasn't sure.  That night he was having trouble sleeping so was up at like 3AM.  I was awakened at 5AM by him calling having a minor panic attack.  He didn't want to wake me but since he'd been awake, he'd killed 8 tiny bugs who shall not be named!!!! EIGHT! 

He woke me when he found one in the spare bedroom.  

I have a fairly severe phobia but mainly of the HUGE ones that fly.  The little ones just gross me out bc they usually mean "infestation" which WHAT THE ACTUAL F**K?!?!  We are borderline obsessive clean.   

He said he was tiptoeing around the house with a flashlight.  Every once in a while you'd hear "AH!" *splat*

By the time the sun was slightly up he'd killed about 15.  FIFTEEN!  He was awake now enough to be like WTF happened?????

We realized the ONLY "new" thing in the house....was the new....APPLIANCE...

He crept over and shined the light inside......................

IT WAS INFESTED WITH SKINNY GERMAN ROACHES!

What happened next was something out of Supernatural.

He carried it into the garage.  Did a Home Defense circle around it.  Then DROWNED it in Raid.  Like I'm sure it was no longer functional. 

He Home Defensed every doorway in the house. Then waited until the sun was up up to carry it to the curb

Meanwhile I am in another state calling an Exterminator.  I explained what happened and he said "I can have a guy there 1st appt."  

Now I'm home and so far I haven't seen any but Hubs has killed a couple more...one being in the effing cup cabinet.  So everything in there got washed.  

What kills me...like just WTAF man.... is that I literally was telling my travel buddies about how good of a deal it was and said "watch the damn thing have roaches in it". And we all had a good giggle. Clearly the universe has a sense of humor.  

Positive side of it...when they treated the house it also kills a bunch of other stuff so, yay.