I think I lost a nipple

In recent travels I started writing on the opaque shower walls.  Like once it’s steamed up I write “I know what you did”, “your husband knows”, or just “I know”.  You might says it’s pointless because they clean after every guest...true but I feel there is a height limit to the shower cleaning....like above the head, it’s good unless noticeably dirty.

Anyways, I am currently on a getaway trip with the sig other.  We have this....shower.  It’s super nice. Big enough for four 😳 with two wall shower heads and a rainfall head above.  The problem....the water temp is either Loki’s nipple or Hades hot tub....there is no in between!  So I either 

or

.....looks like I’m losing skin this trip.

Not to mention, for a five star hotel, the water takes FOREVER to warm up! Once it got to Dante’s inferno I realized only one head was working.

After fiddling with a knob, the rainfall started but it was freezing cold *shrill scream*. I stepped in once it was around the surface of the sun.

But why is that other wall just dribbling...?

FINE I only need two heads!

After my skin adjusted to the boiling waters of hell, I began to enjoy my multi head shower.

I was bent over shaving a leg when that stupid third head decided to join in the fun. By sending a powerful blast of ice water straight at my tatas.

The spray was coming out so hard it covered the entire shower area.  Opening the door would have soaked the bathroom.  I finally plastered myself against the opposite wall and tried to turn it off. 

Every direction I turned the knobs just adjusted the two original heads.  This mutant shower head was unaffected. 

It eventually warmed up to cooling lava but the stream was so strong it exfoliated...well everything and I was still covered in soap.

I did my best impression of a speed showerer and somehow managed to finally turn off the water.

I have no idea what happened but looking at the head, I think a piece popped out that controls the intensity of the water.  I’m now bright red, half shaved, with a knotted mess of hair...but hey, at least I’m clean....