I immediately regret my decision to Google that...AGAIN

Okay so we all know I binge watched Jessica Jones, right?  Right.  Anyways, if you read my random ramblings here you will see there is a statement that piqued my curiosity. 

Everyone's favorite love to hate psychopath said something...which I could only assume is British...or would it be English...whatever its one of those...slang. My thoughts were "He called her an anal crumpet....is that a weird sex thing?  Or an interesting insult... ewwww". 

So I told my husband this and he's been randomly parroting it around the house because he is FIVE...but at some point he changed it to @$$ Crumpet...then he randomly Googled it last night because he wanted to know what it meant ... and now I am SCARRED FOR LIFE!

Urban Dictionary:
A crunchy ring of residue built up around the anus. The result of poor @ss wiping.

In case you didn't know Urban Dictionary is always 100% accurate and true *sarcasm* but regardless I need a memory wipe that doesn't, uh, leave any residue.  

FYI the "definition" for the original term is (Urban Dictionary):
The anal crumpet is an individual whose morals have collapsed into the rectum and much like hemorrhoids, they are painful to be around. This is an individual who is despicable and irrefutably nasty and has a history of being a player or attempting to be a player. The anal crumpet has no morals or is morally ambiguous, making them extremely unattractive or otherwise creepy.

I've been laughing hysterically because that is basically the description of Kilgrave, which if this is a true "definition", I am assuming is what the writers were trying to convey.  But since I didn't know the slang (clearly meant to be an insult)...I was confused.  And because I was scared of actually Googling that term...I didn't Google it.  I mean how do you explain THAT in your web search history without sounding like a perv?!?!  So I let my husband do it *muahahaha*.