That's a really ugly cat....

So the other night I was cooking dinner after picking up my FINAL online order of gifts.  I let big crazy out alone.  While slicing my tomato I hear little bit "ARF!".  Um what?  Since she was looking out the back door I decided to go check on Speedy.

As my eyes focus on the dimmed lighting in the fog, I see Speedy walking towards me (and my open back door).  He had something large and furry IN HIS MOUTH!  It was limp...CRAP!

OMG is that a cat?!?!?!

OMG that is not a cat!!!!

OMG that is an opossum!!!

OMG drop it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He wasn't being aggressive with it, just holding it.  He gently put it down *whew*.  It picked up its head *double whew*.  He growled *$hit*.  It played dead *oh thank God*. 

Seriously though.  It was laying all weird with its mouth open and tongue hanging out...legit playing opossum. 

I said very calmly "come on buddy...lets go inside".  And he LISTENED.  He kept looking at it but we went in.

He was foaming at the mouth, whining, and wagging his tail.

JFC sit still so I can check you for cuts, blood, bites, whatever!

He was fine.  So I go check on the opossum.  He/she was sitting up looking dazed and NOT happy.  Speedy didn't hurt it but it was COVERED in dog drool....ewwwww!

I then proceeded to have a very one sided conversation with it. 

Hello, Mr. Opossum....are you okay?

Did Speedy hurt you?

*angry stare*

Can you walk on your own?

Do you live under my shed?

*hiss*

Do you want me to leave you alone?

*head turn*

OMG I'm having a conversation with a marsupial....

*From the neighbors yard* "I have a gun if you want to use it"

*yelp* Hi....no I'm...its fine...not hurt....no need to kill it.

"Well if it comes in my yard, its dead"

Mr. Opossum...don't go next door.

*belly laugh* "Have a good night sugar"

When I got inside, I checked Speedy again.  He's fine...he said I spoiled his early Christmas Present for me....thanks buddy, I'm good. 

I have NO DOUBT that he would have brought that thing inside had I not gone out. 

He seemed to think it needed help..maybe.....it was fairly small compared to the massive ones we usually see.  He wasn't trying to kill it...just bringing it to me....it was weird....I mean he did good...still weird. 

Mr. Opossum went on his way at some point...I haven't seen him since.