I am such a pessemist sometimes!

Why can't I just be happy!?!

OK so I have gone on 5 dates with younger guy and we are REALLY hitting it off. He seems to like me a lot and I definitely like him. Ya know how I know...? Because I have talked about him to my friends...I don't do that. Ask a twin...getting me to talk about my dating life is like PULLING teeth hahaha.

We talk on the phone and text quite often which texting, yea I do that a lot but I hate talking on the phone but I talk to him soooooooooooo yea.

He's smart, funny, cute, fun, motivated, good hearted, understanding...shall I go on? I know he has flaws too... like smoking (blah), not the greatest job (but he is working on that...he had TWO interviews last wed...), kinda stubborn (I have NO room to talk there haha). But anyways I really like him. But I keep waiting for him to be a nut case! What's wrong with me hahaha. I am trying to surpress it :D.

I had a big scare though last night (we hung out for a few hours after work). You see I kinda SUCK at lying. And I haven't really said anything about my living situation. I mean he knows I have a roommate and that said roommate is male. Well last night we were talking and it slipped out. I was waiting for the "I don't think I can handle that" talk. Instead I got the "I like you way too much to have something like that get in the way" talk. I was like "I know I understand its weird, I'll get my...wait what?!" He asked questions. I explained situations. And he understood. He did say I am a bigger person than him. He left EVERYTHING to his Ex...just left. I cannot do that. I have WAY too much invested in the house...plus my name is on the mortgage and it's hard to find anything else when you have something like that on your credit :P.

But he said he trusts me...which he should...but it surprised me because most men cannot get past the living with a person of the opposite sex thing, much less an EX! He also said it helps that he can tell we don't really talk (me and Ex). Me and Younger Guy talk at night before I go to bed. He said if I was hiding something that wouldn't happen. Plus he's heard us interact when he is on the phone and he said its very roommate like. AND I stay out till all hours of the night with him and no one calls looking for me. Hahaha.

*sigh* I REALLY REALLY REALLY like this guy. Even to the point that he is maybe going to meet my friends this weekend... SHOCKING I know!!! I told him if he wanted to meet up with us at a festival this weekend he could. He said he was glad I asked. He wants to meet them but he would NEVER invite himself or ask to be invited. He knows I had issues with Internet Guy and well one he's not like that and two he didn't want me to be like OMG no way. Hahaha.

So that's right chickadees if you are going on Saturday with me to said festival there is a good chance you will meet Younger Guy ;) Be nice please, hahaha

I think I need a restraining order!

How dumb can one guy be?!

Ok so the best way to a woman's heart is...by calling her a whore and then asking why she doesn't want to be with you...right?! OK so I was gonna do this right and actually try to talk to him...because thats how I roll. But the other night he texted me and said "So are you and ______ together now?" WHAT?!?!?! Seriously!? So at that point I decided he could rot in hell :P.

Tonight he messaged me...here is the conversation:

IG: hello NOLAGurl
NOLAGurl: Im filing my taxes whats up
IG: oh u know..
IG: just kind of wondering why i havent heard from you in almost 2 weeks
NOLAGurl: because you sent me a jackass text the other night so I figured it wasn't worth calling
IG: lets see, his face is the only guys face in your pics, lets rewind the clock here, your promos, Halloween, Abita Christmas Bash, BCS Championship, Rascal Flatts, Irish-Italian parade, shall i go on? anyway, all the time u make for your friend, "Purple ______" which im beginning to wonder to just how u know that exactly now....anyway, u call me a jackass, thats fine...
IG: youve been nothing but a lying bitch this whole time to me anyway whos done nothing but waste my time
NOLAGurl: Your an ass, thanks. insult me all you want. your suspicious, insecure attitude didn't help. And yes maybe I am seeing someone else now....or at least thinking about it... and NO ITS NOT ________
IG: i dont give a fuck who it is, thanks for wasting 7 months of my life
NOLAGurl: good bye IG
IG: i was nothing but understanding of you and all your emotional drama and bullshit and lies
IG: look where that got me
NOLAGurl: You blame everything on everyone else. I am a liar with emotional drama. You are a mama's boy who never grew up. I cared about you. Take that for what its worth. And no you weren't understanding you just like to tell yourself that
IG: hmm u live with your ex
IG: go out constantly and gotten fucked up how many times?
IG: and blew me off for the holidays
IG: and dresses like a teeny bopper for concerts
IG: and im the one who hasnt grown up?
NOLAGurl: We dressed up for NKOTB and your using that against me.... Look I need someone to like me for me.... And I know there are people out there that do/will. I like to be me. You never accepted that...and I think I may have found someone that does
IG: i never accepted being treated like shit
IG: i made all the effort
IG: u never did
IG: lets see our second date u were over an hour late
IG: lets see
IG: lsu-florida, u were too fucked up to see me, good thing i wasnt at Lagers already
IG: im in the quarter trying to meet with u and u dont answer ur phone, probably because u were with _______ or some shit
IG: Thanksgiving no effort
NOLAGurl: Um yea I wasn't with _______ and I was drugged for the LSU UF game…but thanks :P
IG: Christmas, blown off completely
IG: new years, never saw you
NOLAGurl: New years you hated me bc of christmas
IG: quite shocked i saw u for my birthday
NOLAGurl: Look I dont need to relive this and neither do you. I saw you for your bday bc I wantd to.
IG: what else a few weeks ago, u call me in th wee hours of the night
IG: working u promo, and u were trashed
NOLAGurl: I wasn't trashed asshole. I know why you have issues with women, you change everything to fit your reality. honestly Im not sure any of them were crazy...they were probably normal and got tired of your bull.
IG: hmmm youre the only real crazy one ive dated NOLAGurl
IG: youre 27, and act like youre 17, and the only thing u have on me, is that im at home right now, even though im currently working on resolving that as we speak, not that u need to know that
NOLAGurl: Good for you. I dont act like I am17. Just bc I have a life and you don’t does not make me 17. What makes me 17. My mortgage, my job, my love life? Really....most people think I am much older.... having fun and being immature are two different things. I have responsabilities...lots of them... and I am working on my situation too, not that you need to know that.
IG: just like u were working on it back in August right?
NOLAGurl: Nope actually different but it wouldn't matter to you. I'd move out and you'd find something else to hold over my head.... I'd stop going out and then something else would surface....I'd alienate my friends and then you'd finally be happy maybe. I dont really care anymore. I wanted to do this right but whats the point.
IG: just like the reason u didnt want me over in the beginning, had absolutely nothing to do with EX right?
NOLAGurl: huh?
IG: exactly how were u gonna make this right? just continue to ignore me?
NOLAGurl: No. BUT I wasn’t going to tell you to eff off via IM. I was going to be an adult about it and have a conversation...then you texted me on Monday about _______ which infuriated me and my date. I decided at that point it was pointless. there is no making you happy
IG: well lets talk now, what exactly did u want to say?
NOLAGurl: whats the point so you can tell me Im lying, imply that im a whore or try to make me think something wrong with me for being me....or refusing to end a friendship bc your insecure. Which part would end well???

As I type this he is still IMing me asking what I wanted to tell him and I have not responded. I am blocking him/deleting him on both social sites and vi IM.  I attract PYCHO PATHS!

The crazies had a revelation...

Is it possible to get someone to realize they are a lil' crazy?!?!?!

So Internet guy and I had a 'talk' the other night. I FINALLY got him to realize he's a bit crazy (that sounds bad but its true). I mean for goodness sakes after we were only talking a couple months he had a freak out and accused me of being on a date when I was in the quarter with my friends (not that I couldn't be on a date but still). And then the cornering of my friend at a bar and grilling him with questions about me. Not to mention the lovely recent accusation. After we didn't talk for a few days (I was trying to distance myself bc I am REALLY interested in Younger guy) he called and said and I quote:

IG: "Where have you been?! Why didn't you call me?!"
Me: "I was busy with family and other stuff, sorry. I texted you... and no offense but my life does not revolve around checking in with you."
IG: *yelling* "Well what were you doing?!"
Me: *Ok i am annoyed now* "Ya know I don't think that is any of your business..."
IG: "What were you doing?! Who were you F**KING??"
Me: *in shock now* "Are you kidding me? Thanks for that, I appreciate it. I have to go"
IG: "I want to know why?!"

This is where the rest of the conversation went...

We went over ALL the situations/conversations when he freaked me the heck out. And why bc of those neurosis' I did not want him around my friends/family. By the end of the conversation he was very sad but it needed to be said. I kinda eluded that I was seeing a new guy but I never said it because I am too nice to be hurtful. But I know I got my point across. I don't want to be with you, I don't want you to get to know me any further, I'm not even sure I can be friends.

Anyways, when we were about to hang up he said "I just want to say one thing to you please, *sigh, deep breath*". I stopped him and said please don't say anything whether its nice or mean its not necessary and will not affect my decision. He asked me to call him Tuesday (I didn't, I texted him and said I really didn't want to talk). Then he texted me yesterday and wanted to see if I was having a good day and if he could see me. I never replied... I am doing the right thing I think. He cannot separate fun dating with serious relationship, soooooo yea.

I don't think we will talk again. Although he has a couple of my books, grrr. I think he was trying to impress me when we first started talking. I told him I like to read and he 'pretended' to like reading also and borrowed a couple of my espionage books and never gave them back OR read them. So all in all I think I did what needed to be done. He was insecure, fake (see above comments for example), jealous and clingy oh and did I mention STALKER like tendencies... I do NOT need that.

Don't Stop Believin'...

Haha, Is it possible to find a male version of you (like in a good way)???

I don't know how else to put it. I went on a date with the younger guy (that's what we will call him now ;)) and we really hit it off. We have a ridiculous amount in common! I mean we like A-LOT of the same things, have had similar life experiences (including a long term relationship/engagement gone wrong) and seem to have the same outlook on life.

OK so we met for dinner after work last Friday. And holy crap, I am extremely comfortable around him and was having a lot of fun just talking and being silly. So date going well so far, we decided to go bowling (he wanted to go play putt putt but it was rainy). We went drop my car off at his house and I met his TWIN and his sis in law. They were nice from what I can tell, but I was only there for 5 minutes. BUT I did get to play with the 4 month old yellow labmix puppy!!!! Who then peepeed all over the floor because she was so excited... ooops my bad, dogs like me, haha. Anyways he kicked my butt in bowling! But I guess it doesn't help that I SUCK at it, hahaha. So we got a pitcher of beer (romantic right ;) haha) and were bowling and I realized how cute he is. Plus he has the greatest personality so then I was like crap I like him... I wonder if he likes me?! But then my question was answered really quick when he came up behind me and hugged me...YAY! Hahaha.

After bowling he was like lets just go hang out someplace...OK. So we go to a bar nearby and he was DYING for a cigarette (yucky :P) because we'd been drinking and he was really embarrassed about it but it was our 1st date so I didn't want to be like no you cannot have one...so I said how about I go to the bathroom and you do whatever you need to. After I couldn't really tell but we were in a bar sooooo I dunno. We talked for a while about...everything. It was crazy, I don't think I've ever talked that much on a 1st date! Well the bar decided to shut down at like 11 so he was like wanna go hang out at my house. My first thought was no, but he didn't seem like a crazy person so I said OK. And no he is not crazy ;).

We sat on his couch in the living room (his bro and sis in law were in bed). We talked some more (good lord ;) haha). Then I turned when he asked me a question and he kissed me which I wasn't expecting for some reason. Wow...good kiss :D hehe. And I was a little leary about it because I've kissed a smoker before and it was kinda...well not really nice. Well this was nice...really nice. So for the next few hours (hush :P) we were laying on the couch kissing and talking. It was such a great date! But finally at 2AM!!! I was like holy crap I have to go. Which by now it was STORMING and I had quite a drive ahead of me :P. So he walked me out to my car and kissed me again, hehe, and asked me to call him when I got home.

Well on my way I get a call from my roommate...he was drunk and needed a ride... GREAT! So I went pick up his drunk butt. That was intersting. He was all hanging on me telling me how great a friend I was and that he's glad I don't hate him anymore and I am so great, blah blah blah. I was like I know, I love drunk talk , haha. Anywho, I talked to youger guy when I got home. He said he had alot of fun and would really like to see me again. Yay!!! So I think I definitely want to go out with him again.

It is a little weird though because he is just a few months older than my LITTLE BROTHER! And I am the same age as his OLDER SISTER. Argh! haha. I mean I look the same age as him (and he looks young) sooo its stupid I know, but I've never dated a guy younger than me :D But I like him so I guess we'll see what happens. We are supposed to get together again this weekend!

Fresh Meat!

That just sounds wrong doesn't it?

Well it's true. I've started talking to a couple more guys, hehehe.

New Guy Number 1:
He is from down the bayou. Met him on social network site. Accidentally ran into him in person after we started talking while going to lunch. Then went on real lunch date Saturday.

Pluses:
- Tall :D HAHAHA
- Smart
- Funny
- Kinda cute
- Loves LSU
- Gets my humor
- Likes Animals

Minuses:
- From down the bayou ;) haha jk
- He smokes (when drinking)
- Wears braces (but having jaw surgery soon to fix under bite)
- Works for same company as my Ex
- Says inappropriate things (very sexual content)

He's a very nice guy. I'd have to talk to him a little more to get a better vibe. But he kinda talks funny. It's because of the jaw issue so I try to look past it bc he is in the process of fixing it and that's superficial, right :P. I have a dirty mind as well so its hard to judge someone on that but I usually keep mine hidden at least until the second date, haha.

New Guy Number 2:
Met him on social network site. Just started talking. He's from BR. I haven't met him yet soooo I only have phone conversation and pics to go by.

Pluses:
- Average height (about 5'9")
- Looks sexy in pics
- Athletic (Plays soccer)
- Smart
- Loves LSU
- Large family
- He's a twin (:-) haha)

Minuses:
- He's a twin (if you know my friends you get this hahaha)
- He's a little younger than me
- He lives in BR

He's not ridiculously younger than me... only a few months older than my lil bro so it's kinda weird. But age is just a number, right? :P I guess I will have to talk to him a little more so I can get a better vibe, haha.