Maybe I need to change my diet because these are getting out of control.
Buckle up it's long....
I'm walking into a small but very well lit bar. There was one bartender. He was cleaning a glass (how movie-esque). He looked at me and said "what the f**k is she doing here?!"
That's when I noticed I walked in with someone. It was an older man but not old. He was very...mafia looking. But he was fit not fat, and nice looking. He said "she is my assistant. Where I go, she goes!" The bartender threw a glass and said "I don't need another f**king chick to babysit".
Um Excuse...?! I glared at him but he was cleaning up the mess. I mean what the hell is his problem?!? All I noticed was he was tall, fit-ish, and dirty blonde hair and very grumpy. A lady came down the stairs, wait...stairs...? Now I am in a house...a HUGE house not a bar. But the small bar with tender is still there. The bar is beveled glass and lit up blue (classy). Moving on, the lady. She ran over to me...well as best she could in ridiculous heels...and gave me a tight hug.
She was the boss' wife and apparently the other "chick" the bartender was talking about.
I don't recall much but I know I was doing a lot with money and books. I went everywhere with the boss or his wife. The bartender warmed up to me a little but was still quite an @$$. We fought ALL THE TIME. He clearly didn't like me.
I know I talked to the boss about some weird transactions that concerned me. He told me its business. Okay.... It jumps and I see a hidden safe with, are those thumb drives...? And documents...and stacks of money...?!?
The wife and I were "friends" but I didn't trust her. Something was off.
I am arguing with my new nemesis when the front door explodes into splinters. I hit the ground hard and there is a weight on top of me. I hear yelling and chaos. My eyes are watering and I'm coughing (is that tear gas?!?). My frenemy is on top of me. He's yelling "don't f**king touch her. She doesn't know anything. She's just a nanny!" What...?
I am yanked roughly to my feet with my hands bound behind me. My boss is being led out in cuffs, the bartender is in cuffs, I AM IN CUFFS, but the wife is not. She is talking to an FBI agent *WTAF?!?!?!*
I'm in a sleazy hotel with some agents, bossman, bartender, and another person. We are now tasked with getting my boss safely to the airport to testify. He's in cuffs and a bullet proof vest and is terrified. He said someone on the inside is selling info to dirty cops/agents and he is the sole witness.
We are walking to a decked out Jeep. The bartender is trying to keep me from going. He is insistent it's too dangerous. I said, "Sorry dude, I part of this now, I HAVE TO GO, besides what does it matter to you?!?!" He grabbed me roughly by the arm and bent down in my face, "Because I F**KING CARE about you!"...."oh".
We pile into the jeep. That other guy is driving, he's very italian and a bit heavy, boss man in the passenger seat, me and bartender in the back. I tried to scootch all the way over but am grabbed and belted into the middle seat, "yo WTF?!?". He sits next to me and puts an arm around me *ummmmm*.
I'm in a suit (WTH). It's super uncomfortable. I am really nervous. Bartender is holding me tight and whispering something in my ear. I don't know what but I teared up and shivered. I leaned in closer to him. We are making our way to the airport when we are forced off the road by two black SUVs. Everyone is panicking. The agents aren't responding on the radio. We are under an overpass in gravel. Everyone in the car is yelling and not listening to me. Bullets are pinging off the outside of the jeep (is it bulletproof?!).
I grabbed a remote looking thing from my purse and smash the button. Fireworks go off outside and the assailants seek shelter. I cold cock the driver in the face and scream for everyone to get the f**k out. As we are running towards a fence bartender is like "WTF?!?" Someone is shooting at us. I pull a glock out of my waistband (what is happening?!), turn around and open fire on the jeep. I hear the driver yelling, "you double crossing b**ch!" One bullet hits home and a tire explodes knocking him over.
We are in a cabin. It's just me, bossman, and bartender. I am trying to secure the place. They are freaking out and looking at me like I grew a second head. I finally introduce myself as a special agent. I was undercover as his assistant but realized the corruption at the FBI and flipped. I am pinned against a wall with a very angry bartender in my face. I kick him in the baby bags and pin him with an arm behind his back.
I say to my boss "your wife is in bed with the corrupt agents. I didn't know who I could trust anymore. We are laying low until my contact gives the all clear". Bossman is freaking about the collapse of his empire. I release my bartender and open the hidden safe (AH HA!). I realized what the wife was up to and collected evidence on her, the corrupt agents, and stashed lots of cash. I transferred the businesses out of their names and made him the primary owner with me as an advisor (just in case, *shrug*).
My boss is giving me the most ridiculous bear hug but the bartender is still pissed. "ow ow ow". I was shot. I had a vest on so mainly bruised ribs but I had a hole in my bicep (OW!). He says give the bartender some time to process.
I had the suit jacket and vest off and the white button up half off trying to clean my arm. Its bleeding a good bit and is very painful. Someone is yelling, grabbing my hand. "Don't do that! Are you stupid?!? Do you even know what you are doing?! You probably need stitches!". My bartender... he's still pissed and red from the neck up. He looks like he's already showered. He gently takes my arm and begins to clean it. "Mother F**ker!!!". He glares at me. Dude what...it hurts!
He numbs it a little with whatever I had in a kit and stitches my arm. Mind you I can still 100% feel this and it doesn't feel great. Bossman comes to check on me and smiles. No no no, don't do that sir. He winks and walks out. Oh come on! Once he's done, I say I need a shower.
Before I can walk away he rests his forehead against mine and says "You could have told me".
I start to look up..... and gasp for air.
Suddenly I can't breathe. WTF?!?! I jolt awake to a cat...ON MY FACE!
No comments:
Post a Comment